This is a shameful take. Have you been to Miami?

Thank you for taking time away from vigorously licking the boots of NFL owners to provide this important and insightful sports take.

Miami is one of the best cities on earth, the way Adrian Peterson has a “#1 Dad” mug.  

Doesn’t matter if he finds professional satisfaction.  Only that he not get too uppity?

This guy gets paid millions of dollars to generate hundreds of millions of dollars of revenue for his owners. In return he will live with medical issues and addictions that the NFL will do SFA to help him with.

The whole game reminds of that old high school koan, that if you did X amount of hits of acid you would be legally crazy, but at the same time, you would also be so crazy that no one would care that you did acid in the first place.

This looks dumb and weird as hell.

Did you actually read the first sentence or just the headline?

I did. Then I wrote this post 

“Expand those markets”

Wait, i thought VW made the Rabbit?

Bugatti actually challenged him to bring his cul de chienne to Abeille d’Pomme.

Pretty soon, Mercedes will be congratulating BMW on being an "excellent manufacturer of grills" -- and they won't be wrong for saying it.

“How should we paint your little 4-door car here?”

[Gruden voice] THIS TEAM I CALL ‘EM MORRISSEY BECAUSE IN A PANIC THEY’RE TRYNA HANG IT ON THE DJ

I want Sabine.

You are the one driving a 240SX, you tell me.

+1 bottle of rock and rye 

I didn’t know Ford made a Taurus convertible.

Have you ever been sexually assaulted? Was it by one of the most famous athletes in America? 'No' on both counts? Then maybe you'll begin to grasp why you can't understand that mindset. Not sure why this is your first reaction, either.