Thank you. I don’t want to be judged for giving $10. Or $20. Or $40. Or whatever. I can probably afford to give more. So the fuck what? 10k is nothing to sneeze at. I wish I could afford to give them that much.

There is no downside to her act unless you really, desperately want to find one.

Oh, they’ll realize it when they’re dying of untreated kidney failure or something. Really, though, it shouldn’t take that much.

Those people will lie or “misremember” who they voted for in the future, when they talk about the election with friends, children, relatives, and neighbors. They will pretend they were not the morons who risked everything for their egos and didn’t barricade Trump.

Were you asleep for the 13 days between the first and second debates or just black out drunk? Donald Trump, his son and his surrogates started bringing up Bill’s sexual misconduct on the night of the first debate after it was clear that they had lost, and kept bringing it up on cable news, the Sunday shows, and…

What’s amazing is I really think he might have gotten away with this had he and his campaign not been so stupid as to break out Bill’s past to use against Hillary. If he had kept his mouth shut and hadn’t started giving signals that he was going to bring up these charges in the debate, I don’t believe that the Access…

I honestly think he never gave a second thought to any of this before now, because he never considered that there was a possibility that these women might not have liked it before now.

The secret trick to getting an empty seat next to you is.....to switch to a seat with an empty seat next to it. Got it.

Twice, in the past 3 days, I’ve had people tell me “It was an inside job!”

To be fair, we also all wish Michelle was our mom, too.

I think everyone kind of wishes, deep down, that Obama was their dad.

I can’t help but feel somewhere deep in her heart she wishes Obama was her real father.

This was SO SLICK of Hillary. The nicest thing you can say to someone is to say something nice about their kids, plus her campaign is very children/family oriented, AND she doesn’t have to actually say anything nice about him. It’s like, yeah, his kids aren’t terrible, so maybe by correlation he’s not terrible. But he…

I’m genuinely a little puzzled as to why all this is suddenly news. This is what he’s been doing for years, going on Howard Stern or other shows and being gross. Any of his republican opponents could have broadcast this stuff, it wasn’t a secret. Why the shock and horror and fainting couches on the right now?

Silver lining: Ivanka (born October 30 1981) is 22 days from being free of her Dad’s attention.

It’s easy to imagine Hillary Clinton wiling the evening away with some close friends, laughing over champagne over all of this mishegoss.

No, they hate poor people who don’t pay taxes or otherwise benefit from the govt. Rich people who don’t pay taxes is their aspiration...it’s gonna be them someday!

It’s not that they won’t care, it’s that they won’t see it..... Trump supporters don’t read Jezebel.

Like we don’t need tons of guns anyway, but why the hell are they making BB guns that look like real guns in the first place? I actually understand the officer: how was he supposed to know it was fake? Have like eagle-vision and be able to spot that the barrel was smaller? In the like 1 second between it being pointed…