This reminds me a lot of the ‘03 Pats team. And Teen Wolf.

You could maybe put out an eye with a bullet like that, but not much else. Bullets need a chamber and a barrel to get their velocity, otherwise the pressure from the gunpowder igniting mostly dissipates without propelling the bullet.

Ahem...

He’s trying to be the store brand PFT Commenter.

Sweetie, ask somebody to come over to your computer and explain the joke for you.

Really good point. They also probably could have gotten him with the statute of frauds, or res ipsa loquitur.

He hates moxie.

You’re gross and you should feel bad about yourself.

You’ve really nailed what makes great sketch comedy: realism.

Who should be offended by this?

Well, if your concern is economic, the fact that it is significantly more expensive to administer capital punishment than life in prison without the possibility of parole should make you opposed to the death penalty. Right?

Her name is Principal Mrs. Coach Taylor, to be accurate.

Thats...not it at all. Tami Taylor drank a shit ton of white wine on FNL.

Lots of people “deserve” the death penalty. Whether the state should be in the business of handing it out is another question altogether.

Has Gawker ever deleted a comment because it was critical of an advertiser?

Man, if you ever need a reminder that Drew Magary’s writing is funny, but someone trying to write like Drew Magary is painfully unfunny, just check in with Mr. Kluwe.

The world is a completely different place than 1950's Mississippi. The will of the people has eliminated many of the issues from back then.

I don't think it is the gov't's place to tell a private business owner how to conduct business

Ummmmm somebody skipped the chapter about the Southern Strategy in their U.S. history class.

This is so gloriously dumb I had to star it. Congrats.