but he smiled when he played baseball

So, fuck this guy then. He got all the love when he died, but he would clearly have been guilty of manslaughter had he lived. He killed two people.

The lesson, as always: Don’t drink and do cocaine and then leave the bar and go drive your boat as fast as it goes.

Dongfang is man’s only defense against vagina dentate.

I was so excited for them to walk into a bar and then it didn’t happen.

Mike Francesca, Trump, a middle-school doofus farting his way through an oral report on a book he forgot to read.  They all sound identical.

IT’S LIKE A CONTRARIAN HIPSTER SPORTS TAKE MEETS DR. SEUSS BOOK

To bring this little piece of news even closer to home, how about we all share our sober birthday? I know there’s many of us here that are recovering addicts.

Northwestern, the official school of people waitlisted by the Ivy League

The story is bland garbage, but if you get a ground of friends and jack up the difficulty to the highest, the gameplay is actually a ton of fun. Lots of great emergent gameplay moments.

That’s such a lazy joke, if we can even call it that. I’m in camp If You’re Gonna Be Offensive, At Least Make A Joke That Isn’t Also More Than 100 Years Old. My camp also needs a better name.

And your vagina.

Small enough to fit in your vein, evidently.

Oh sure, NOW the republicans believe in science

The party of small government, y’all!

“WHAT AN INCREDIBLE LAST SECOND SHOT. AND YOUR BLAZERS CHANCES OF MAKING THE PLAYOFFS ARE REDUCED EVEN MORE.”

I would totally leak it, but I feel like that would be unfair to all these NCAA executives who work so hard all year (for mere hundreds of thousands of dollars in some cases) to make sure that every single one of these kids preserve their sacred amateur status and the money goes exactly where it belongs: to the adults…

I cannot stand looking at pictures of his fucking bloated, disgusting, orange, fleshy face. I scroll past them as quickly as I can before vomit starts inching up my throat and my laptop keyboard is ruined.

If something like being transparent with his taxes wasn’t enough, something silly like disobeying the Presidential Records Act certainly isn’t going to get him into any trouble either. While I don’t think his statement that he could kill a man in broad daylight and get away with it is true, I am reluctant to admit…