Dude picked the wrong Bruin to impersonate:

“I Face-timed my mom and was like, ‘What the hell is this thing?’ ” Meyer said. “I was freaking out. Absolutely freaking out.”

Come on now - I don’t need to be a hockey stain to be completely impressed that the dude takes a cleat in the mouth and still makes the tackle.

Spot on.

I know I speak for most Americans when I say:

It gets better....

No, no, no, no, Grandma - this is the Navajo. You, my friend, are shooting for the Cherokee.

“Oh sure, leave it to the white man to do the tough jobs”

Tino Martinez had 22 chances to get a hit off of Bartolo and never got a hit off of him.

I hate that I actually googled to see if this was a thing, because it sort of seemed like it could be a thing.

Maybe he should’ve used a Dali.

Scariest thing to happen to white people since the OJ verdict.

Where R. Kelly remains his stiffest competition.

Je me souviens.

Overheard at the dog track...”Arf arf arf arf” is loosely translated as:

Holy cow - someone famous is a total shithead?

The last time I ate Papa John’s my colon was publicly humiliated.

“In the minds of many, particularly in the North and Northeast, Alabama has become the poster child of the narrow-minded, the self-righteous, the extreme”

I know you got your degree in English from UT, but....

Hilarious that you think Vandy kids would venture that deep into Appalachia.