Steaks are seared, maybe he meant like that? 

Dad’s are required by law to find that line funny, and as a dad, I can confirm it is funny.

Oddly enough, Mountain Dew Baja Blast. It’s weird how nature does that, isn’t it?

So, with the maximum erection possible? Will do!

But not letting anyone see your terrible statue is very, very easy.

I missed the deal! Is there a way to have the announcements alert me on my phone?

Some people love small talk. They talk about the weather, have whole philosophies about it, in depth discussions of the weather the last few days. Laugh at stuff that is CLEARLY not a joke. Actual conversation I heard:

Shut up, dude. Watching Uncle Ben die is my kink. This last Spider-man reboot gave me serious blue balls, and I don’t know if I can wait 5 more years until they reboot it again.

I have a feeling there will be a lot more Chinese actors going forward.

Yeah, some of them play like that. Almost comically (no pun intended). If you wanted the ultimate Nazi film you could just CGI blond hair and blue eyes on the Spartans from 300, and leave the Persians exactly the same. It still kicks ass, though.

I’m assuming Netflix series aren’t eligible, but the Thriller Stranger Things trailer was really great:

He looked better in this costume:

They’re so easy to hide:

People post this article EVERY TIME when there is something even a little bit related to Liefield. It’s fucking infuriating!

http://www.metalbandnamegenerator.com/

I think it’s that people with disproportionate privilege tend to be unhinged from reality. Check out some conspiracy theories of African warlords/tyrants, and check their body counts. 

I find this comment inappropriate from someone with your avatar.

Dibs on “Nitroglycerin Steve Harvey” as my new band name.

Is it like a lizard tale, but it can be re-attached? I’m fascinated.

Ouch. Welcome to the timeline!