Salmonella. Its well documented.

Imagine killing your grandparents just so you could ironically roll your eyes at a live performance by Vanilla fucking Ice for two hours.

I’m shocked someone got him to stop, collaborate, and listen.

i think there’s a nice cross-section of irony-seekers, moron freedom-lovers, actual vanilla ice fans and...let’s say radio station giveaways to get to that number.

“Stay home! My fleas carry the plague!” ~ Master Splinter

It was an All-Can-Eat Wing Buffet they were paying for, Vanilla Ice just happened to be playing.

Got knows what kind of viruses we would get from the turtles though.

His Bastille Day concert, however, is still going forward.  

Ah, yes, the ‘90s, when we didn’t have computers, and Hotmail was just a USPS mailbox in the direct sunlight.

This is how low the bar is right now. Just try to be at least as reasonable as Vanilla Ice, dipshits

And profit is where the two groups meet.

i assure you all the capitalised letters got squirted into his child. Give them another couple years.

Trying to figure out how calling Ted Cruz the Zodiac Killer somehow humanizes the Zodiac Killer...

Seems like calling Ted Cruz the Zodiac Killer is more likely to humanize Ted Cruz.

I’ve always maintained that the only explanation for someone who has a creepily-forced and closed-lipped smile like Ted Cruz’s is that absolutely no one, including family, ever smiled at him as a child and he had to learn by teaching himself.

Wait a sec, I just figured it out. You’re actually ZODIAC MF aren’t you?

QUIT TRYING TO HUMANIZE THE ZODIAC KILLER

Not enough Jesses/Jessies...

It was a really interesting concept and I really wanted to like it. But it really couldn’t seem to decide whether it wanted to be a misanthropic satire or a genuine exercise in self-loathing and ended up tumbling between two stools. And that eulogy scene everyone praises just sounded to me like something an edgy…

They forgot to include Women Exist To Either Make Men Miserable or Slavishly Devote Themselves To His Every Need in the tags.