Front hugging, sinful and verboten. Molesting four of your sisters, including a 5 y/o, boys will be boys. Lesbians licking spoons, SINFUL PROPAGANDA THAT IS HIGH IN PROTEIN AND GREAT WITH FRESH FRUIT.

999,999 problems but a brain ain’t one.

One Million Moms has at least 999,999 too many. The 1 left would likely fade away on her own.

Charlize Theron: You dodged a bullet, girl. And thankfully didn’t have to use one on that wifebeater Penn.

Because people think they’re cute, and what’s a shortened life in excruciating pain compared to having a cute widdle kitty?

So Ms. Dolezal was homeschooled through the same “school” I was. I got through and still managed to become a gin-swilling atheist, but if she internalized any of the bullshit curriculum, she makes way more sense to me now. It’s not as bad as the Duggar curriculum, or it wasn’t in the 80s, when I was a student, but it…

Dunno about around the back, but I can touch my belly button from the front. Boop. #notaclone #probablyamammal

Kristen Wiig

Rachel Dolzeal, this is what it means to be black in America. Please tell us your experience of being hit and arrested and having your jaw broken as an authentic member of our community.

Meanwhile in Chicago Monday night/Tuesday morning following the riots after a hockey game, where 5 cops were injured and 6 squad cars damaged, where one cop was grabbed by the throat by a “reveller” as he tried to get another off a light pole, there were no reports of officers’ guns brandished or shots fired to subdue…

Dear “Good Cops”,

what the actual fuck. i had to stop watching that video, and i seriously have an iron stomach/easily bleachable brain. those poor kids. those fucking animal cops. THAT FUCKING PASTY-ASS WHITE DUDE WHO WAS RAMMING THAT POOR BOY INTO THE BARS BY HIS NECK WHO THE FUCK IS HE AND WHY IS HE NOT IN JAIL FOR ASSAULT JAYSUS…

Fellow Dolezal enthusiasts, I have a treat for you! It is a series of YouTube videos called “Rachel Dolezal (2014) talking about her experience as a ‘black woman.’”(Sorry I can’t link directly, I’m on my phone.) There are five videos, their total length is about 50 minutes, and they are GLORIOUS. Are they loaded with…

Remember: Every time we read about Rachel, we’re missing valuable Kardashian news.

It sets my teeth on edge when people say that a woman like Amoruso is “the feminist for Millennials” because she’s brash and flashy and successful. I do not belittle her success, but let’s be honest here: she’s a person who with lots of hard work, yes, but also lots of help, and lots of luck, rose to the top. Also,…

Is that a pentagram on your chest or are you just happy to see your DARK LORD?

I used to work at ModCloth, and this is EXACTLY what happened there, minus a book deal for the founder. Almost word for word.

I dunnoooooo guys, this is not really worth it. I’m not even a comedian and I would have had a difficult time not saying something similar after a professional interviewer said the phrase “inside an 11 year old girl.” If anything he should be dinged for saying something so dumb. I didn’t see it as a joke so much as…

Mindy Kaling always reminds me of a stay at home mom who is profoundly unhappy and is channeling their corporate shark into being the best PTA mom around and that pressure has made her start stealing her kids Ritalin.