gasoltrain
Gasol Train
gasoltrain

Hint: The machine works just fine, they just don’t want to mess around with cleaning it.

Should’ve been you, Curt Schilling.

Conservatives:
My business is successful because of my personal accomplishments.
My business failed because of your politics.

I’m a White Sox fan too but I didn’t really see the joke as “the White Sox suck.” I saw it as “let’s take the most random rebuilding team in 2017 and make a bunch of updates about the most irrelevant things that happen to them.”

I thought it was pretty funny for the most part.

Rumors are that he’s shipping up to Boston to play for the Patriots.

Another handy tip for avoiding Nazis on Twitter: don’t use Twitter.

I was madder than hell when it happened. But I’d be pretty pissed off if the Yankees didn’t offer him a contract based on that game (I believe his contract is up after this postseason). I think he’s a pretty good manager, and he’s good with younger players. I thought he did a real good job with the kids during his one

Bret Bielema is the one who left because he couldn’t pay his assistants enough. Andersens reason was because he could’t bring in his academically substandard recruits

Are you really Tiny?

It’s easy to get cocky with a letter like M, though. Witness the Montreal Expos logo.

Nice, so United really is as crappy as it seems.

You can’t spell ‘aloha’ without ‘a-hol.’

Literally, the highlight of the entire season for me.

As a hater I was laughing my ass off and screaming for joy when he caught that ball.

Fuck Penn State.

I went to a (I forget which) Disney-princess-themed wedding. Yeah.

There’s nothing anyone can say about the city of Philadelphia that Bill Burr didn’t cover in his infamous 12 minute attack on a philly audience.

I’m not sure this is even about being fiscally conservative. Taking on 83 percent of the cost and only getting tax revenue back is immeasurably stupid.

It's a safe bet Pete is the only Deadspin guest author who successfully* completed an appearance on Showtime at the Apollo.