I just want a peaceful solution. Read more

This could all be cleared up with some paperwork that's in his office, so he ... runs from the cops all night and barricades himself in his house instead of surrendering? Okay, I think the "single mother immigrant" might not be the best guess for person who went off their meds here. Read more

No, his dog has a Twitter account for him Read more

Man, I hope Mayhem has Allstate.

What they think they look like:

Wiz Khalifia really lives out "Wake up and smell the Roses." Read more

No, it's a straight-up brag. I've put in a lot of fucking hours to get to a point where I can run a sub-3 marathon, you bet your lazy ass I'm going to be proud of that.

Fuck you. Go accomplish something. Read more

I bet he had a good alarm clock., one set with the volume up and no snooze. He probably had a wake-up call aranged as well... and maybe a back up generator in case the neighbor blew out the electricity. Read more

Joke's on you, BYU doesn't even know the Hail Mary. Read more

here's another NYC poop storage facility

Fascinating technology. Everyone should learn about this in school. I think modern plumbing and waste disposal systems have had a negative effect on our attitudes as much as they've had a positive effect on our public health. They make us think our shit don't stink. Read more

It should also be pointed out that the other drawback to a combined sewer system is that when there is a giant rainstorm and the system gets overwhelmed, it's not just rainwater spilling back out of the sewer. Read more

Gives a new meaning to the term cock ring. Read more

By that token if I really care about women, I can't support the music industry. If I really care about women, I can't support the television and movie industries. If I really care about women, I can't want my US citizenship. If I really care about women, I will avoid institutions of higher learning. If I really care Read more

I'm a lifelong football fan, but I can't watch anymore and there is nothing the NFL can do to change that. Football is a terrible sport where young boys get life altering injuries. The boys who are able to play are treated as "special" by their schools and given passes an behavior and grades. This turns them into Read more