Old lady here. When I was 22 and starting out as a manager, my first boss said to me—If you have to decide to do something, either do it because it is right or don’t do it because it is wrong. Because if you are doing it in order to be thanked, you are going to have a very fucked-up and unhappy career.

I’m sure its just a simple misunderstanding, someone in administration probably concluded that a hockey team in Arizona shouldn’t need to pay for Whitener at all.

I call BS. No one was working overtime selling Coyotes tickets. I’ve seen the crowds.

za

I just wanted to say, fuck you, for calling pizza, za.

Split the difference, adopt the Penix as a mascot:

“Gah! My phenis got stuck in my zippper!”

Always stings when they remind you that you’re just part of the help.

You left out the question that the reporter asked Trump at the press conference in South Korea; which was a brilliant question and should turn into a talking point for anyone who wants gun regulation:

So, so many pics of old man balls are in some intern’s future.

“I fought to protect the freedoms you enjoy in this country, so you better stop fucking enjoying them!”

♪ ♫ Ooooooklahoma where the refs go messing up the games! ♬

You might want to cut the ref that threw that flag some slack. Just imagine how it must feel working an entire football game with a stick up your ass. And, as is self-evident, a sharply pointed one, at that.

People think the world laughs at us because of Trump, but really it’s because our favorite sport involves losing points if the ref thinks you’re being a little shit.

“We can’t have the inmates running the prison,” McNair said.

From the Reading Comprehension Tees

At the time of the dunk the Mavs were getting blown out by 25 and it was comfortably in garbage time, but oh, Jordan Bell having a bit of fun is the point where the Mavs felt “disrespected.” Please. Don’t want Jordan Bell to style on you? Maybe don’t lose by 25.