Please lemme know if you need help making a nonsensical sepia toned commercial.

Should start a bargain cologne line Chocolate. Made with like pelican pheromones or something.

I can say that’s the least accurate thing I’ve ever heard ever. His plane crashed in the ocean.

Always love a nice sunset, one of those things I can just intrinsically think are nice.

I know, it was impropriety on my behalf. In my defense I wasn’t trying to snoop or anything it was purely situational. That being said, lesson learned.

I was house sitting for a buddies dad a few years back. I was watering the plants on the roof when a sudden rainstorm hit. I was only on duty for the night and so didn’t bring much in the way of replacement clothing. I was soaked so I took the liberty of helping myself to one of his dad’s shirts. I opened the top…

He used to, last I checked he’s an entomologist now.

I respect that foresight DG. Sound planning on both your behalfs.

They can just blow that shit off at the dentist with a water pick in an hour or two. I smoke and drink coffee but I got my choppers cleaned last week and it looked like I got new teeth.

Guy I fooled around with back in high school could suck his own dick. Was frankly kind of alarming to watch, like his spine was gonna snap then he’d impale his brain on his own cock. What a way to go.

I know! I’ve had some weird craving for them lately, I don’t think they exist in the wild anymore sadly.

We talking ‘get rid of’ get rid of or just off T.V., like stranded in Peru or a deserted island or something? I only accept payment in Amazin’Fruit gummy bears and Prussian Francs.

Oh my god that’s the most accurate comparison fucking ever. I’d give you a million ultra stars if I could.

Reminds me of Andy Bernard on the Office, when he starts dating Erin and says he doesn’t want the drama, incites a bunch of drama, then admits to being a drama queen. I just don’t get the appeal of the entire family.

Dudes be acting crazy

Men do have men only clubs/spaces, and have/will have them for the foreseeable future. Why did you waste you’re time arguing with a dummy?

Ah, now that is something my reclusive self can understand. Social media seems so intrusive now a days. I don’t understand the appeal, although I am a recluse so why would I? Sorry if I came off as derisive Mrs Monarch, guess I just wanted to hear your deep smoky voice.

Why should social media play a part in anything? Unless you want it to?

Don’t pet that rabbit too hard.

Why can’t we just fuck what we like. Seriously as a collective as long as it’s not children or animals or not consensual who gives a shit?