Nobody going to mention that one of the robbers was a young and slightly methed Skip Bayless?

You heard the man, people: do not, under any circumstances, like, share, retweet or discuss any Deadspin articles, no matter how much you may have enjoyed them, lest they gain goodwill without proper payment. And need I remind you that they are owned by a multibillion-dollar company?! I can’t quite articulate why that…

Scouts want to know how he’d have performed if it was under a shotgun.

“Guess he’s not a gunslinger.” - Gruden

We all know DC’s real anthem:

It’s true, the Leafs won a whole bunch of championships when there were negative-two teams in the league.

“What’s a conference final, eh?”

There’s no doubt that Ryan Kesler aims to throw top players off their game, oftentimes with a whole lot of play in the “grey area,” and often succeeds, and is hated around the league for it.

(jumps out of time traveling Yugo in a town square in Montreal in the 1950s) THE CONFERENCE FINALS IN 2017 WILL BE PLAYED BY ANAHEIM AND NASHVILLE (hops back in before mass civil unrest erupts in Canada)

So...he has risen?

This is a reminder that a call up to AA would mean Tim Tebow is a proud Binghamton Rumble Pony, which is just fantastic.

Hear hear. 2010 was their best team - including this one - and they screwed it up by buying what the Canadian press was selling after being upset. (Durr need moar gritz durr.)

Melrose is all over SC this morning saying that the Caps should trade Ovi. If that’s going to be the narrative coming out of this series it’s going to be a long, dumb offseason.

+1 Kurt Russell.

The miracle on ICE

Look, man, I’m just sick of all this winning.

They get bounced earlier than expected, and are subjected to humiliation?

Thanks for coming to Deadspin, Mr. Turgeon

This is what happens to D.C. when you put a Russian in charge of it.