... because their unbelievably trivial fashion choices differ from yours, no less. If you’re going to denounce all women who like Ayn Rand, that’s a smidge less frivolous than proclaiming undying enmity over loud shift dresses.

Thank you!

Nail. Head.

I am a cooper skinned afro caribbean girl with a shaved head, and I think I would look wonderful in those.

I have a dirty confession...I think these dresses are cute as shit. They remind me of the shifts Mia Farrow wore in Rosemary's Baby.

But alas, I am poor, fat, white trash. Maybe if I throw a NASCAR jacket over one of them?

One time in LA, I watched a dude order a double meat Seafood Sensation / Cheesesteak hybrid. He sheepishly looked at me and said “Surf and Turf”. Haven’t had Subway since.

My most embarassing moment was the Project Graduation. I was so pissed at everyone, that I sulked throughout the entire day, because here was a bunch of people who had made high school a living hell for me, and now they were all of a sudden being nice to me. I didn’t speak to anyone, I didn’t eat anything with anyone,…

How else are you idiots going to learn?

I read two pages of his bullshit (that's enough) and now I'm of the opinion that while his family may be dysfunctional, his need to put everything in public, not just his and his wife's decision to be non-monogamous, is part of the problem.

So they don’t do it because they’re dicks, they do it because they’re manipulative fuckers who want all your attention. Or because that class of water MIGHT turn into a mouse.

Mice can take many forms. One must always be on the alert.

My cat enjoys pulling my headphones out of my purse/gym bag, chewing them just a bit, and then pushing them back into the bag.

This is why I’m a dog person.

I have THE BEST BATHTUB in the world. It’s an antique iron, claw foot tub. When you fill it up with hot, hot water, the whole thing just radiates perfection. That bathtub is my refuge. That bathtub is my Fortress of Solitude. That bathtub makes awful days into cathartic tub cries.

Worst place I ever got sick was camping in the Sierra Mountains with my family. After a week of camping, on our last night, I was struck with a really nasty stomach bug. We had spent the afternoon drinking margaritas, so when the first wave of nausea hit, I thought it was the tequila. But no. How I wish it had been…

Alright, I’ve never posted anything on Jez but I can’t resist this one-

(I am writing this on behalf of my dog).

No- I absolutely know it is real- my brother had it. Doesn’t mean there isn’t an absolutely INSANE conspiracy about it.

Marsha Brady. MARSHA BRADY