I am counting the days until Ivanka gets jailed for ethics violations, and get repeatedly assraped by some violentanimalbutchdykes in jail, and gets her face caved in for not giving up her commissary.

Yes prison rape/sexual assault is wrong, and should be prosecuted and not tolerated.
Yes, women who love women have my…

You mean, Corona by The Minutemen?

You know she died on the operating table right? She and Mary Toddd Lincoln are now the only two spectres allowed to haunt the White House. But with Melania, she will pull some “Stir of Echoes” shit and drive The Cheeto Tiny Hand into insanity like the fucking Tell-Tale Heart and Trump will pull a Bud Schuster on…

While In high school in Maryland in the mid-to-late 90s, this was THE car to have, though it had to be in black.

My family was never well off, parents divorced, but after waiting (cuz my mom was a alcoholic nightmare) my dad helped me get a car when I turned 18 (I couldn’t even get my license til I turned 18, cuz my…

Can we talk about, for a second, all the fucking exposure his stupid fucking mother is getting? A fucking modeling ad campaign (or two?), a fucking profile on CBS Sunday Morning, it’s like Bitch no one fucking cares that your 75 and trying to look 45, and failing at both, you fucking old dumb skank who raised a…

Too late; Cash Cab already killed someone

Is that true??!?!?

Rinsing or soaking Onions in water does nothing.

From ATK:

Cole Slaw is required to have celery seed, carrot, red and white cabbage. Simple. Plain. Done.

I think the most fucked up thing about this is THAT THIS IS NOT MANDATORY. Racist Becky and Justin can simply choose not to attend. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS SOLVE ANYTHING. FUCK YOU STARBUCKS YOU FUCKING PIECES OF SHIT.
Guess its time for dunkin donuts from now on. Shit.

wait, has this been proven? I was always freaked out by her Westworld like demeanor, but damn, fake voice. wtaf.

omfg this is what I came here for. Her voice is so fucking unreal, like that can’t be real, she has to be a Host from Westworld. Like wtf woman. This isn’t a gender thing, this is a “What the fuck are the sounds coming out of your mouth??”

Like that APP from like 10 yaers ago that cost $1k, and all it was was a digital jewel that showed up in your phone’s screen, wasn’t it called “I’m Rich, Bitch” or something?

You...don’t? You just get the seeds from the melon and plant them?

Do you know how botany and horticulture work? Because from your comment, I don’t think you understand these basic concepts...

#SnitchesGetStiches
#And2-5forObstructionofJustice

Eddie Huang once made a good point that if he ever saw Tostilocos in a bourgie restaurant, he would pop a blood vessel.

Stupid gringo...“elote guy” would you call a chef a cook? No, the proper term pinche guey is “ELOTERO”

If you were actually a Los Angeleno, you would know that, fucking Orange County trash.

The only way you would stop our suffering is if you stopped masquerading as a writer and got another job in another sector far away from Deadspin readers. Seriously, how creatively bankrupt is this site, reposting 2 year old articles that links to 5-7 year old articles. What’s the fucking point any more for you?

Albert…

Also, can Deadspin and associated sites STOP FUCKING LINKING TO STUPID TWITTER VIDEOS THAT NEVER FUCKING LOAD ON YOUR SITES. LIKE FUCK, ACTUALLY LOAD THEM AND EMBED THEM. THEY NEVER FUCKING LOAD.

Fuck these dumb nukkas. Smdh, no wonder Shaq sounds like that, too many bells rung. Or not enough bells rung to begin with, Fucking pieces of shit.