God, you are insufferable. I honestly think Deadspin only keeps you on to troll soccer fans. Now STFU and go beat off to Arsenal 03-04 highlights.

“I’m sorry for that thing I did. I mean, yeah, I knew it was wrong, which is why I did it in a sneaky way, and then lied about it. But I went ahead and did it anyway, and really enjoyed myself, and had an experience that relatively few people got to have, even though it was clear that it was intended for people other…

So with 9 years of hindsight, the obvious conclusion to draw is...Simmons was 100% correct here?

Them’s fighting words, Kluwe!

“5,000 WORDS ON WHY THIS MEANS MLS IS WORST THAN THE AUSTRALIAN 4TH DIVISION” - Billy.

except ESPN’s MLS coverage is incredibly weak, and most actual fans don’t use it for anything other than checking the scoreboard. Their soccer coverage is entirely targeted at bandwagon eurosnobs.

That not to say MLS isn’t lagging far behind the euro bandwagon for eyeballs, but it’s still a fatally flawed metric. It’s…