So dimly lit that a cell phone camera could see him clearly from the other side of the track.

It's very good to see Deadspin covering stories that don't involve a sport.

Even though Ward seems to be way out there on the track, the engine rev is pretty awful. Don't know if Stewart could see him or not, but why hit it at all at that point?

I don't know if Tony intended to hit him, but I'll be very interested to hear what excuse he has for jumping on the accelerator like that, whether it's publicly or in a courtroom.

UNBELIEVABLE. I'm calling BS on this one.

At FSU, they charge every student the same fee but you have to sign up for a lottery each home game and the big games you were not guaranteed a ticket, but the student section (12,000 seats) was general admission once you got a ticket. The big basketball games (UF, UNC, Duke) you had to show up a couple days early to…

Rich old guy likes floozies who like him for his money... story at 11

The women claim that they didn't know the photos were being taken, and that they had nothing to do with the alleged extortion plot.

True, but we prefer cheese of some kind, fried and wrapped in bacon.

You've clearly never been to Milwaukee. We will get drunk, stoned, fat, and maybe throw things at opposing outfielders, but we aren't dicks.

When Morse was asked about the girl catching his foul ball, he responded ".. .——. — / ...- . .-. -.— / .... .- .—. .—. -.— / ..-. —- .-. / .... . .-. .-.-.- / .— .... .- - / .- / —. .-. . .- - / .—. .-.. .- -.— .-.-.-"

Prince Fielder would like to state unequivocally that he is not a fan of the idea of an entire half of the plate being unused.

LaRussa: Oh, come on! Who cares if it was 95 miles per hour?! It was placed in a safe spot.

Hoover might be nuts, but he still wouldn't have signed Tony Romo to an extension.

How did you get your hands on my wedding album?

If icing is a violation of NCAA rules, then I'm pretty sure college hockey will soon cease to exist ...

How could his back not hurt with that big fork sticking in it?

Beach Lou: It puts the lotion on it's skin or it gets the hose again.

If you are what you eat then it appears that Lou Piniella is everything.