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We three kings.

If Demi Lovato and I met each circa 2010, I think together we could have destroyed the world/a hotel room/our noses

Ever since I heard a story about Demi Lovato punching a guy in the face because she was coked out of her mind, she has earned a permanent soft spot in my heart.

Boehning, Randy.

Well to be fair, Grindr is made specifically for Randy Boehning.

Randy Boehning.

If you haven’t seen the John Waters segment from Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous, it is a must-watch:

It figures that the living embodiment of ‘cocaine logic’ would be really into mirrors.

Ugh, this wannabe victim. Riding the rape-accusation train to GLORY. Now look at her. She’s got everything! A face with a mouth! College! A mattress! Some people who don’t like this precious male on her behalf! WHAT NEXT?! WHAT ARE WE GOING TO GIVE THIS LIAR NEXT?!

Just give me the baby and the Steve Buschemi dog and we will all go live happily ever after far the fuck away from these garbage people.

The fact that he did it while mountain biking and slamming a Mountain Dew, though, THAT was extreme!

I hosted a Parker Posey film fest at my house once - House of Yes, Party Girl... ok it was 5 of us, and there were only two movies, but we did make VIP passes for the event.

So let’s just get this straight... many states (and many republicans) don’t want to let women who get pregnant from rape have abortions, BUT they are ok with letting that child live with an abusive and dangerous person.

If we, as a nation, can raise $862,000 in a day to cater a hypothetical gay wedding with hate pizza, I’d like to think that we could afford $5 million per year to not further cause harm to rape victims.

It used to be that a woman was believed to be property of either her father or her husband.

That is totally how a toddler would try to pick up a baby. Babies lifting babies!

I have to get behind the tried, tested and true: Maybelline Great Lash mascara. I have been using it since I was 14 and I still get asked if I'm wearing eyelash extensions. And for around $3.50 I really don't see how you can go wrong.

I have to get behind the tried, tested and true: Maybelline Great Lash mascara. I have been using it since I was 14…