How, do you do fellow kids?....I totally understood all this and know what a hypebeast is!

My only question is, WHEN WILL THIS HORRID FANNY PAK TREND END?!??

it’s more of a macrostatement than a tailored-for-all-relevant-situations statement, but I can parse it out further if necessary:

FOR THE LOVE OF THE SWEET BABY JESUS WHO DIED ON THE CROSS.

So another Playboy model?

I for one can’t wait for something, ANYTHING, to happen. my liver and kidneys can’t take any more abuse.

I hate Wendy Williams.

Y’know, I have issues with Comey for obvious, election-related reasons, and I don’t think any of the stuff above is of particular import... but I also know that it’s precisely the kind of thing that will get right under Trump’s skin and explode in a beautiful series of (hopefully) incriminating, ill-advised tweets.…

Look, I’m penis not here looking for dink a fight, but it’s weiner misandrist comments like dick yours that make peepee it so hard for men boner and women to unite dong against common enemies like 45.

These jabs are great and all, but this motherfucker was still part of the reason Trump won. The whole hand size thing...can dudes stop thinking about their dicks for like 2 seconds?

I’m so conflicted. On one hand, I’m loving Comey’s takedowns. On the other, I’m tired of his sanctimonious vibe and essentially tipping the election because he assumed Hillary was going to win.

See, I assumed that they’d signed NDAs.

“Flop around on and sweat all over”. Pardon me while I go barf up my breakfast.

I can’t believe that I live in a world where Donald Trump can find a near-unlimited number of women to flop around on and sweat all over.

Frankly, if a long time sex-addict like Donald Trump - who was definitely raw-dogging Stormy Daniels, hasn’t fathered at least a few children out of wedlock, I’d have to say that someone needs to explain the birds and bees to me again.

“My fetus is gay”. It should make the nut-jobs heads explode.

too bad we can’t do something similar for firearm purchasers:

“the neighborhood witch told me that if brought to term, the baby would be a gender-fluid socialist, and would go on to have a successful career in politics and be the first president to enact the repeal of the 2nd amendment”

At 18...”I don’t want a baby, I want to go to college.”

And what happens if people choose not to answer the questions? Or write in snarky answers as they damn well should?