Sounds like you need to get fucked.

Well start your own company and you can make those rules!

You’re not subsidizing shit, the company is paying for it asshole.

Maternity leave isn’t “time off”. Do you honestly think that people are just sitting around doing nothing during their leave? It’s fucking medical leave for a reason. A woman’s body takes MONTHS to return to normal after having a kid.

It’s so cute that you think raising a newborn during maternity leave is a sabbatical. HA HA HA HA HA.

What bothers me is the whole idea that walking around fat or plus sized should be “inspiring”. Like, you’re so impressed that I can hold my head up high instead of cry into a package of cookies or something. I don’t need your pity or your platitudes about how I’m so “strong!” and “beautiful!” because honestly, I don’t…

Yes, if you are a rich white dude.

I also really like golf. It is relaxing. The hard part is finding multiple uninterrupted hours in my weekly schedule to play.

Thank you. You know who had a “once-promising” future before they were raped? Me. 20 years later I still battle anxiety and depression. These fucking stories INFURIATE me.

Wow. Fuck you. Just wow.

I already know that my 1991 Color Me Badd Video Scrapbook VHS is priceless.

She looks like she’s had some work done.

I love your screen name.

I’d believe this because sometimes I wake up in my sleep and my arm is dead AF and I can’t basically bend it in half without feeling jack shit.

See also: police officers and firemen. So don’t complain when your $10 million dollar house is burning down and it takes the volunteer emergency responders 45 minutes to drive there.

ziiiing!

No, only in that one scene in the Departed. You know the one.

Samesies. How fucking naive I used to be. Now I’m just pissed off.

Thanks a lot Eve, hope that fucking apple was tasty.

You know who else was an Art History* major? Martha Fucking Stewart. Take that bitches.