I guess that also explains why Drake and Steph are about half as freaked out as Chappelle.

And other times you can see a wife-beater right through a uniform

This is the east coast. There is no “the” highways. It is “76" or “I-76"

Played in Philly, or had 100K on Nova?

Judging by the bio, Hardy has animosity toward anything with a period.

This kid writes like he’s going to be a washed up NFL punter in 10 years...

li’l Jose tho.

Take that Brian McCann you fat fuck.

Hoisted on your own p(ub)etard.

No doubt, the single greatest thing ever associated with Deadspin. Take a victory lap, internet.

They call them scalpers to honor them.

Because they’ve already mastered building a turbo V6 for glass-smooth roads and dust-free air?

I’d call this the worst case of a guy with an unpronounceable name destroying a Jet in New York, but…well, you know.

So much great advice here, and really well-written too.

I would say you should never have a BAC higher than your batting average, but I firmly believe in Dan Uggla's right to have a single drink whenever he chooses.

Knock, knock.

As a fellow R******* fan, allow me to jump in and offer a tepid defense of these "dull-witted" fans. We like a football team. That's supposed to be a diversionary experience. None of us wants our fandom to become a lightning rod for controversy, we just want to root for our terrible football team and that's it. …

The sad irony of this, of course, is that Taylor's death had at least as much to do with him being a millionaire who lived in a big house as it had to do with him being a young black man. That is to say, the guys were robbing the house because it was big and they figured there'd be lots of valuable shit in it. …