I routinely use the apps to preorder because you’d be insane not to. The business model has flipped and customers standing in front of you are now third-class citizens.

Wait, people are reheating pizzas in their pizza boxes by putting them in the oven?

It must have made your day when you saw Dannis Ree modeling his Oscar Mayer leisurewear on Twitter last week.

Hoagie Hut!

So you’re saying it’s time to grab a few dozen packages of toilet paper?

I pre-smash regular burgers - I bought a package of 5.5” parchment squares and I use a tortilla press.

Grab 2-3oz of meat and

I can’t for the life of me figure out how Starbust is number one while Jolly Ranchers are number five.

You act as if this is a bad thing 🤨

h/t to Eat This Not That for first making us aware of the story

Which restaurant serves the brisket sandwich you like? Are we talking Smoque? It should be Smoque if you’re talking about brisket.

That Illinois has picked Airheads is unbelievably apt. That’s why Chicago is the Windy City.

The solution to pollution is dilution.

Good news: that pepperoni pizza you bought has even MORE meat!

I’m pretty sure most of the Domino’s hate is coming from my Twitter feed. Sorry for messing things up, America, but Domino’s has got to go.

Dammit, Dannis - I told you your joking was going to lead to trouble.

God, I hate batter coated fries. It’s such a cheat and it messes up the flavor and texture of an actual honest-to-God french fry.

Peterson, Pierson and Wierson. Was there a run on the other letters of the alphabet?

Unfortunately, past his expiration date.

I’ve often been tempted to get some of that powdered peanut butter to add even more peanut solids to a peanut butter ice cream base because there can never be enough peanut butter.

Dannis “Floor Pie” Ree is wondering how often food falls to the floor. 🤔