i know several women in confederate states who also would pick cousins over a black man

You’ve gotta think RG3 is counting the minutes until he’s a free agent and he can sign with a less dysfunctional franchise, like the Jets, Raiders, or the Republican Party.

“Plenty of people tell me that being forcibly sent down a trail that will be fraught with tears isn’t so bad.”

Translation: It’s too hard for me to acknowledge that I got suckered. So I’ll just pretend it didn’t happen.

“Neither can I.”

If bleeding and scrotal bruises aren’t abuse, where do you draw the line? Is punching your kid in the face “discipline?” Should a parent lock their son in the basement for six months to teach him right from wrong?

Well, how is he supposed to know if he did anything wrong if someone doesn’t beat the shit out of him first?

I remember the Atlanta Falcons being in the NFC West. Forever. 1967-2001 - including a stint in the NFL’s Western Conference COASTAL Division (1967-69). What sense does that make? Oh, and at the same time, the Braves were in the National League West (1965-1993). Wha?

Ahhhh, the infamous “battle of the bays”... GB vs TB.

You’re right, Brady was busy fixing his own balls.

This is a microcosm for something. Idk why but I’m fucking dying at this. Crying laughing literally.

Having the Chargers and Raiders share a stadium and a division would have made the annual stabbings so much more convenient.

Giving a last place kid a trophy for showing up is a form of public humiliation.

The worst thing about Saints fans is that they need to check with their wives before emailing Deadspin.

Yeah, this isn’t reverse sexism it’s just regular old paternal sexism combined with bureaucratic inefficiency.

“Mine was worse.”

Sports News Website Reports Sports News; Readers Outraged

Smart move logging onto a sports website on the night of a big sporting event you’re trying not to spoil for yourself, fuckface.

Truly a banner week for news on NFL stars who destroyed digital material under suspicious circumstances.

This is the hand that abruptly ends....