Andrew Luck is going to be the richest athlete ever. His salary won’t even include all that extra cash he makes by charging people to cross the bridge he lives under.

That is why Buffalo Wild Wings and other sports bars are godsends.

“All crucial decisions made in the Atlanta area are made with the goal of avoiding traffic, and then failing to avoid that traffic.”

And that the fucking remedial chant is so easily thrown back in our face. Even my 4-year old thinks it's funny to say "J-E-S-T", and that little bastard can't even read.

Sean Peyton: [puts $1000 on the board next to Galette’s picture]

That is a powerful image. It is just staggering see all of the women together. It drives home how much of a goddamn monster he was.

Can we start a site-wide fund drive to get, like, 250* people to donate to Planned Parenthood— in Rand Paul’s (dis)honor — this week? It would be HILARIOUS, and also PP/PP Action Fund needs all the help it can get right now.

When the guy mentioned being upset because he couldn’t smoke a Newport at the game, I thought I was somehow reading the WYTS: Cleveland.

Actual conversations I’ve had:

He’s the boyfriend who the female lead leaves for the nerd.

If she made better music, I’d perhaps be more concerned with spelling her name properly. Bitch.

The thing that gets me is that, biblically, discrimination is pretty clearly not okay:

Unless you're a billionaire, Bernie Sanders does appear to care about your health, your job, your education, and your life. If you're making more than $100k I think he will end up raising your taxes but if you make less he will probably improve your life more than any Republican presidential candidate.

Poorly thought off selfish comments? Like the ones your BFF made after he was held accountable for reddit level doxxing off a man who works for your competitor? Ya it’s not his fault that he approved an article that’s sole purpose was to shame a man for having the “audacity” to want to have sex with a man. An article…

I read it. I’m sure Tommy Craggs is nice to his friends and kind to animals. But that doesn’t excuse the egregious (and that’s too mild a word) ethical travesty that transpired, that Craggs is partially responsible for, and that no one on the Gawker Media editorial staff seems to want to acknowledge. There have been…

I’ll presume from your statement you’re a lover of the Constitution, or at least a very specific reading of it plus a loose reading of its first and a very debatable reading of its second amendments, but you should note that the qualifier for citizenship is having been born on American soil (not having been conceived…

Ruling the seas and commanding every aquatic animal seems a touch more useful than shrinking and commanding ants only.

“Alright, here we go! Osweilers time to shi...FUCK!”

WELL THEY SHOULD BECAUSE IT HAS GREAT TASTE