I may be the only Jalop to say this, but I like it!

At first I was all “What? This is beautiful. Look at that wonderful little Civic. Such a great little car. What a great family.”

Then IT CAME.

Civil forfeiture doesn’t exist in Canada the way it does in the US. We’re a civilized, democratic country.

Too bad we can never have a Rob Ford - Chris Christie showdown at Dunkin’ Donuts. I’d bet on Rob Ford with the “other” powdered donuts.

I talk to my radio. The news reader says “President Trump walked back his promise to...” and I say “that asshole”.

1st: You joke, Ballaban, but Blackberry owns QNX, which is the operating system power in a pretty sizeable number of car infotainment systems today. It’s great news for our local economy (I live in Ottawa) and should give Ford a nice leg up.

This bad boy. A girl I knew in college needed me to help her with something on her car(so long ago I don’t even know what I did, this was around the early 2000s) but my reward was this... thing. At the time, I had a 97 Mitsu Galant that I entered in shows:

Not my car, but my friend’s Jeep. He put a “CAI” K&N cone filter on his Jeep and immediately went off-roading with it. In a rain storm.

That was his second dead Engine in that thing.

For me, it had to be 2 x 12in subs with amp and upgraded head unit in my - get this - Tan 1993 Legacy Wagon. I got everything for like $50…

The sheriff’s office also noted that excessive deceleration and object permanence were factors in the crash, and are not ruling out the influence of inertia.

You forgot to factor in the value of your personal brand.

I once built an insurmountable project that was a complete rust bucket, when I finally drove it the very first thing I did was a burnout. The clutch exploded less than a week later. Worth it.

“Track Ready” street car != track car. Even those of us with Track Package cars were STRONGLY advised to add a catch can (on our own dime) before going on track.

Relative to a new Twin with 60k miles worth of a power-train warranty, yes. Don’t kid yourself.

D.B. Pooper

oh trust me, you don’t want to try to make the judge feel stupid. I tried and not only did I receive the full ticket, he threatened to hold me in contempt.

I tried it, but forgot my coordinate system. “What is this? Polar, cartesian, cylindrical, spherical?!” he shouted, annoyed. “Get out of my courtroom with this ambiguous crap, and re-take Calc 2 for god’s sake.”

He had a point.

As a physics major, I felt that same urge while reading the article. Being frank, if I ever got into a courtroom, I can all but guarantee I’d be kicked out for “contempt of the court” after dropping “it’s just basic physics” at the end of my argument.

Also fun, there’s a nearby town up here in Northern Ontario and there’s a small company that excavates marble in a nearby town, they then ship it off to Italy where a company cuts it into slabs and sells it as: “Italian hand-cut marble”. Honestly genius.