“I won an Emmy for playing a woman dying of leukemia on L.A. Law, starring Harry Hamlin and Susan Dey.”

No no, it was even worse: a “My apologies to those offended,” which is that infamous backhanded “I’m not actually sorry at all.”

People need to stop with this shit. Other than the IOC, who are just trying to cover their own asses, I haven’t seen one single person give Lochte a free pass. He has gotten infinitely more shit than Gabby Douglas did.

So Lochte basically told the Cartman version of the story

There are a stupid amount of stanced Miatas out there. Such a waste.

I have never seen this. Do they come in a vending machine?

So, a bribe.

Jesus man. When Ryan Lochte is the smart one by getting out of town first you deserve to pay $10 grand.

To be fair, Lochte probably doesn’t know the difference.

Which heroine? I like Wonder Woman. Hopefully, our heroines manage to stay off heroin.

Actually, Lochte and his three teammates all gave different stories to police, steadfast in their commitment to the medley relay.

Note for tourists: When you’re in New York, resist the urge to buy the cheaper Pubic Sternum Patch Kids candy from the streetside “vendors.” Not sure it’s worth the gamble.

Before you ask for it:

You can tell that the wind totally pushed him downward faster than gravity alone. The wind was definitely blowing hard from directly above.

ATGATT

That’s not how it works. Most people don’t like trailers lurking in neighborhoods. The neighbors are going to lobby their representatives and the trailer will become a code violation. I am not saying it is right or wrong, but in a democracy, majority rules.

Thank goodness he's ok - it would have been really ugly if he dyed.

Holy shit - this is just a straight forward informative post explaining the answer to an interesting question. Well done.

Baseball Handbook Rule 34.E:

The random businessman who walks into the match with no socks on looks like the politest idiot on the field ever.