A-Rod has a PhD (in Baseball)... An Honorary Degree from Salem University, the Witch Hunters.

Hopefully this kid takes solace in the fact that he's the healthier of the two.

so we can all just go get a slice of pizza.

[Incognito has child]

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The replies his story got over on Gawker are what's truly terrifying.

There's not a single black person alive who doesn't know exactly what that words means when it's directed at them by a non-black person. For you to even suggest otherwise says a whole lot about your individual biases, and I'm sad for you.

But they get a free four-year education! DERPY DERPY FUCKING HERP DERP.

Looks like Goodell's policies are protecting player safety, though.

It really doesn't matter where the contact occurs on that type of hit, it's all illegal when it's your girlfriend.

Um. No?

Adding insult to injury, it turns out that "Dustin" Pedroia has never cleaned up in his life.

You can't be more misinformed sir! As a fellow Political Scientist, I'm called upon often to render my expertise on all manner of governmental issues facing our society.

Too bad there weren't any cops there to put a stop to this.

Surely you see the difference between:

You might want to sit this one out.

I can only imagine what those poor folks in Cincinnati had to endure last night, watching that game while eating a bowl of Skyline chili.

Indianapolis:

Boston: ::steals phone out of hand, throws it onto field::