Hey! Stop spamming me! I'm sick of it and I'm standing up for myself! Though you probably count as a "real jerk" and may not respond to this strategy, I thought I'd give it a shot.

Thanks for the tip, but I'd be so overcome with guilt about ripping off my cable company I could never live with myself. Comcast has always been so very good to me.

A Raspberry Pouter?

Android only version of this article please. This page is a mess!

This guy's tweet, five minutes later: "Can't believe we got to meet Kevin Hart!!! #RideAlong"

I studied law at University in my country. I am now pro lawyers. I win cases.