it makes me so happy finding all the ridiculous ICD10 codes out there. i work for a health insurance company and we went over some of the more hilarious ones in training

He was found laying in a pool of coke a cola, marachino cherries and seven small umbrellas...

“rendered incapacitated by accidental rum exposure”

Probably just trying to reunite with his human:

It might be the stereotypical Left Lane Prius or Always a Camry that annoys us the most day-to-day but, for the truly spectacularshit? Altimas. Almost always an Altima.

I think you mean “Signed”

The Association of Inflatable Flailing Arm Tube Men would like to see this senseless violence against inflatable, temporary peoples ended. For far too long, our kind have endured needless violence, resulting in many of our brothers and sisters being deflated and discarded. We will continue our work for the equal…

69-degree angle

The only downside to this is it’ll be really hard to convince myself not to call out of work every rally weekend.

Look at her front yard. It’s obvious that this free-spirited woman is loathed by her staid Stepford neighbors so they think they found the one thing that flies in the face of some CC&R they can leverage to fuck with her. I say let your freak flag fly, Ladybug Beetle Tree Art Lady! I’d love to have you as a neighbor.

It’s almost time for Sno*Drift! And there is a metric shit-ton of snow and ice up here this season!

Because wiping in both directions is better than one direction. onedirectionband.jpg

“I don’t need this AAA membership anymore.”

In the end, a woman tried to drive her Buick over the front of the car (in an attempt to kill me)

ENGINEER 1: Commencing satellite separation in 3...2...(taps screen).

I was feeling bad about having to get a WRX instead of the RS. I’m not feeling so bad anymore.

I traded a refrigerator compressor for my first car, a 1963 Corvair. He got cold beer, I got hot trash.

I don’t believe you. Every Subaru has three inherent flaws: two are the head gaskets, and the other is the thin layer of Retriever hair coating the interior.

Tell that to my friend’s 07 WRX, his wife’s 05 LGT, and our other friend’s 2016 Forester XT.