Yeah! And let’s ban escalators and shredders that I might get my tie stuck in too! Everyone should be made to wear helmets at all times by law!! Protect the idiots by enforcing mass restrictions!

But seriously, have you ever driven one? Only a real moron does things like the guy in this video did. He deserves to crash…

She was so drunk she made it that whole way in the wrong lane.

A Tesla spokesperson gave Jalopnik the following statement:

I didn’t know Jezza worked for FCA

There are many Youtubers and only some, like normal people, are hideous shitcannons.

Justin’s been celebrating 4/20 all day apparently

No it didn’t.

Yeah the Lucerne interior looks perfectly passable.

Eating too much toothpaste can make someone seriously ill.

I secretly love the Lucerne. First few years you could get them with the 3800. I’d jump in one and drive from sea to shining sea in a heartbeat.

“Hello, fellow Quebecer! Have you seen the new Buick Wank?”

Huh. The Lucerne interior is actually not bad. Good of you to post.

Both.

My father was slaughtered by a 15-fingered man.

“Volvo has made a shocking pledge: By 2020, no one will be killed or seriously injured in a new Volvo car or SUV.”

Doesn’t count. They had purposely disabled the Volvo safety systems.

* not newspapers — they’re tabloids. A mistake this esteemed site would do well not to repeat almost weekly.

Yeah, but why accept responsibility for your own actions when you can blame someone else and sue for millions?

I’m no big city lawyer (adjusts suspenders...), but don’t you agree to use autopilot responsibly? If you fail to do so, at your own peril obviously, then I believe the legal term for that is Tough Shit.