If the boy had any decency, he’d date a woman descended from the noble and ancient race of cheese-curds.

GOAT doesn’t mean “the greatest of all time including the future which is an undiscovered country which may end at any moment as the sun explodes or a giant meteor strikes the earth sadly finishing tennis forever but leading to the long peaceful green reign of the plant kingdom.” It means the greatest of all the time…

Mustang, totaled twice. Checks out.

I am so excited for this to lead to scintillating conversations with my friends about their recent sports gambling exploits. Thankfully that will lead into a quick side conversation around their fantasy football team, and finally we can discuss a bar they went to last weekend that is one of their favorites and has a…

Millenniums don’t even have to pay their dues before getting massive payouts and that’s why they are soft. Bill Belichik had to work for THIRTY YEARS in the rock smashing factory before anyone even allowed him into the room where you can look at a football. The only thing these Millenniums are DISRUPTING is hard work.…

Worse than that is that fact that almost none of Berman’s catch phrases were his own. The “Rumbling, stumbling, bumbling” was Keith Jackson. His “back, back, back” was an imitation of many former local baseball guys and almost all of the football highlights including “he .. could .. go ..all.. the way” and “the…

Those aren’t his ribs. They’re his serratus anterior muscles. What a stupid article. At least show some before and after pictures if you’re going to proclaim some massive weight loss. He looks perfectly fine.

[Physician and acupuncturist Dr. Igor Cetojevic] suggested that Djokovic undergo a series of tests. For instance, he asked Djokovic to put his left hand on his stomach, extending his right hand straight out and pushing up while he pressed on it from above. “This is what your body should feel like,” Cetojevic said.…

I have a friend who is currently a top 20 ATP doubles player. He among others have told me that the Djokovic camp as a whole is the strangest one in every locker room. Extremely secretive, they won’t even leave a gym bag in a locker if he goes to shower. My friend never said he’s suspicious of something, but his…

To be fair, Uniqlo’s stuff’s clearly made with skinny people in mind.

I was hoping they’d become the Los Angeles Ospreys or Ocelots or something with an “O.” Then they could use this:

I can think of another new symbol that more accurately gauges fan interest

BUT WHAT ABOUT THE LOVE OF THE GAME...IS THAT NOT ENOUGH!?!1!1

Car Race Turns Into A Contest Of Who Can Re-Tire First

I read that as ‘Baby Feeder’.

Just think, if Hillary had learned a single fucking thing from 2008 we wouldn’t be in this mess!

George Lucas is naming tennis players now?