i’m sitting here trying to think of any candidates ever who fit those requirements. will report back soon
my number 3 is coldplay
when i was interviewing for jobs in finance i was told to remove my leadership role in the “college democrats club” from my resume because it would be too “polarizing”.
so. much. regret.
my friends keep pressuring me to audition for it but i’m just so nervous i’ll accidentally slip up and admit that under my smooth, tanned skin and tight designer jeans i’m actually a smelly block of cheese
apparently we’ve all been naughty this year.
my name is fidelity and i just threw up in your shoe lol
I'd jump the fence with a goddamn spaceship for her.
I didn’t!! i don’t think i’ve ever dismissed a comment. your post is perfectly reasonable.
YEP. this is the first time i’ve participated in saturday night social but this morning i was like omg this story must be told (my friends are all way too uptight and waspy to discuss vibrators)
i got manhattan, brooklyn and the bronx. i won’t go to queens or staten island.
my brother’s on an aircraft carrier in the middle east and we can’t send him any big presents, so i’m sending him the postcards of badass obama, badass clinton, badass lincoln and badass washington
i have a large white van. would that work?
i can’t even look at the box anymore because the slogan reminds me of my mom now
smoking really does make it so much better :)
apparently the universe thinks i’m a total floozie and should be more chaste
thinking about kidnapping some kids as a joke
