lol fuck off with this. there’s nothing wrong with having a nanny. there are shitty parents with nannies and shitty parents without nannies. this is malarkey.

Whenever someone brings up the arm-flab dilemma, I put my arms up like a body builder, and tell them “whenever I feel bad about my arms, I remember what I named them. Paul.” Kiss the right arm “McCartney” kiss the left arm, “WINGS!” shake both arms furiously.

It makes people laugh so now I know they’re thinking about…

“thank god Rory chose Yale”

You may take my glitter gel, you may rob me of my Gigapet or my Nano baby, my Orbitz which I was never sure if it was water or soda. You can strip me of my copy of Titanic on two VHS tapes. You can cancel Are You Afraid of the Dark and My So Called Life but my will take my flannel shirts from my cold dead hands!

I was just sitting here thinking of how to continue from there.

Me too, homie. At the first sign of no, I vanish.

I have a super secret life-hack for when I eat at McDonalds. I get extra ketchup and mustard, and then... I put them on my burger. It’s amazing and everyone should try it.

Cuz you keep sucking up all the awesome.

50 DKP plus for working Dworkin into it.

Temperature is just one more thing that the patriarchy controls. This is not about conditioning the air; it’s about conditioning the oppressed classes to accept the cheapest, most convenient, and easiest air that the ruling classes can provide. It is a result of capitalism: An effort to monetize the human condition…

I fantasize about saving men who are fascinated by women who are into mass murderers.

this is trolling but honestly it sounds great to me.

Best thing to do is slam the rock back down with all your might, again and again, until the crunching and squishing and screaming noises stop.

OH WOW SO YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN BETTER THAN ME??? COOL! You’re wrong. I wrote my post. My post says I was crying. You don’t get to decide that for me. And yes, it does. Raining on my face=crying. You are a rude person. I’m dismissing this from now on as I find it pathetic that a nice moment in court, a place where VERY…

Mine are “more sloppy” and down at the bottom it’s “less into exercise”. Sooo... I’m an out of shape slob apparently? It’s embarrassing. I’d rather be “more drug-friendly”. :\

Yeah, I like pie and free pie even better, but the thought of the wall-to-wall old people all wearing their demandy-pants has caused me to steer well clear.

You mean like this gem?

For your tea emergencies, always remember to carry a thermos of tea. To make sure your thermos does not get confused with others during said emergencies, I recommend getting your thermos monogrammed.

From dis guy...or recessive genes on Ross’ side?