OK, I'm sold. I just signed my friend up for it without telling her and am going to sit back and see what happens. Curious to see how Fred Kelly responds to a baffled married woman.

I would kill her for you. If you want.

Ah, ok. I thought you were gonna say it was ruined by women getting the vote, or Brown v Board or the civil rights act, or Roe v Wade, but it's just expanded healthcare coverage and an unemployment rate that, despite it's enormous spike in 2008, has gotten consistently lower til Obama took office that you're opposed…

This is logically flawed in many ways.

"this once great nation"

Berners are the sweetest, goofiest dogs ever. I don't know if all of them are as dumb as mine but he has a heart of gold!

Against my better judgement, I read every one. All it did was dredge up every awkward teenage interaction I ever had with girls I liked, and now I have a desire to get overwhelmingly drunk.

What Mark Twain said about fools also applies to assholes!

No kidding, friend!

I'm trying to figure out if you're a random troll trying to make the customer look even worse by impersonating them and being an asshole, or if you are indeed the customer and don't realize what an asshole you are. Hmmm. Either way, you're an asshole though.

I wear my college ring for me, not you. Hope that helps.

Sooooooooooo... they ate their whole meal, probably ran poor Miranda ragged (because they are dicks) and then, after being provided a service, refused to pay her for it? After getting $50 off of their meal from a Groupon? Holy shitsnacks, I want to punch something right now, but I'm in the office and that's…

ALL THESE SPARSE EYEBROWS ARE RUINING EVERYTHING

I'm only surprised she didn't specify nail length. I feel a deep hunger to pay one of the girls to get 5-inch monster-claw french tips, because I believe in obeying the letter of the law always and the spirit of the law never.

I recall I used to work at a rock and roll venue in Midtown Manhattan. Often, a band would make a request for a specific piece of gear which they didn't have and we'd go to rent it. $8 cab ride over and $8 back.

No. Never do this. We are in a meeting it is because we are (theoretically) discussing something that we could not have an email conversation about. You do not need to answer emails during this time. You are not that important. If a matter of extreme urgency arises that needs your immediate attention, the…

Neither of them look right because both are fake. The "originals" are clearly retouched and someone went ahead and retouched them again to try to reverse photoshop them, which ended in failure.

And it's an expression I associate with teenaged boys and this is supposed to be a sexy underwear ad. It's not ok.

This is a good-ass TV opinion right here. Steve Harvey's a TV host revelation. Did you catch him running the mini-ep on Fallon? He pulls the same dictator shtick that he does with the plebes and totally puts Fallon (whose actual show it is) in his place. So good.