There's weather chitchat that's harmless smalltalk, and then there's talking about weather like it's interesting, which is almost unbearable to me. Have you seen that episode of The Office in which Jim offers to buy hot chocolate for everyone if Phyllis recites a certain number of cliches about the rain (like, "my…

For-profit prisons make me sick.

I'm of two minds about this. Sometimes I fantasize about going to, like, a Scandinavian prison, especially when I wonder how I'm ever going to finish that damn novel. Housing, food, meals all taken care of, no worries about bills or mortgages or any of those pesky aspects of adult life that can be so draining.

Oh give me a break. That midriff top is not for the beach.

In the words of Carrie Bradshaw, it's time for women her age to cover it up. Helen Mirren, to pick a random example offhand, always manages to be incredibly sexy, but also appropriate.

Mine too!

God, twerking is disgusting.

Pink makes me feel like I'm going to shudder and crack down the middle, because I can't stand her music but she always seems like an awesome person. Conflicts.

I honestly don't believe she has that much self-awareness. She seems like the most out-of-touch oh-look-at-the-little-plebians dream world resident I've ever seen.

Thanks for the laugh and the sound advice.

There's more than one obnoxious black Range Rover or whatever in Beverly Hills. Either that or she's getting it on with his assistant.

Tell him not to binge on codeine, in that case.

God I hate it when supposed adults can't say the word "breasts."

By all means, let's just all pile on in judgment of someone whom none of us know personally, outside isolated instances that really say nothing about him as a person. Smart.

I always think this when I hear stories about celebrities supposedly being assholes, especially ones that interact heavily with the public every day. I consider myself a kind person in general, but constantly being peered at and judged and on display would make anyone irritable; I'm sure I would be cold and…

Er, do you read British tabloids? American junk media does not even scratch the surface.

I completely agree, it's such an easy rule that there's no excuse for it. But I'm sure you're aware that her usage here was correct. She could alternatively have said, "I'm not sure where you're hearing this stuff, but it's not from me!"

The overlap between Dirt Bag columns makes me sad that I notice that there's overlap between Dirt Bag columns. I guess they don't read each other's posts.

Me too! Who has the time? I certainly prefer that people like me, but I find that I just am not that bothered now and am interested in following my own pursuits without regard to how "cool" they are. I never feel like I need to apologize for or gloss over anything about myself, except the spots that can be covered by…

Do not sweat it at 25, unless you're an Olympic swimmer or something.