This is where conservatives belong. Not governing, but arguing with teenagers on Twitter. Let the grown folk take care of the important stuff.

I think our defense contractors feel that they owe the Saudis for the boost they saw after 9/11. 

Republicans would never lie about a hostile middle eastern country in order to start a war to help get an incumbent president widely regarded as a fucking moron reelected. 

I hate to be the one to inform you, but this means you're an idiot. Sorry, and good luck!

Vilifying government officials tasked with rounding up and imprisoning people for political reasons is bad, and if you do that, you’re siding with the hoardes of immigrant drug dealers/ rapists who hate America and your freedom.

Gaetz sounds stressed. He should have a few drinks and take a drive to cool off. 

Also, since congress hasnt gotten definitive proof in the first inquiries of their investigation, it's actually definitive proof that the president has been cleared of any wrongdoing and no further investigation should occur.

Hitler, Trump, and Charles Manson all had girlfriends, so that Miller found someone to allow him to fuck her isnt too surprising.

I dont see why we wouldn’t come to Saudi Arabia’s aid after their 9/11. They did lose at least 15 of their countrymen during ours.

Sick burn, bro. Can you provide those names whilst we all apply some aloe?

It's clear that issues arent a thing that are going to sway a trump voter. I think for the debate, the Democrats should just hire roast writers and let the nominee work some A+ friars club material. You cant beat a dumbass in an intellectual battle because they wont know they lost. You can mock the shit out of them in…

Yeah hes totally never done cocaine. 

Lots of old people still say "the negroes" and "the coloreds" and dont consider it a slur. As a racist, I presume trump knows this, too.

Yes, when I think of a group of people so married to their white and Christian identities that theyd be mad at another group over it, it’s definitely liberals.

I miss the old school organic, flavorful tomatoes. These new ones are just so bland and boring.

So we love the country more than Hispanics (though we’re not sure because we love our Hispanics so much) who should love the wall because they’re surrounded by more drugs than anyone.

According to folks like Shapiro, you have all the access to all the healthcare you could possibly ever need. All you have to do is pay for it and if you cant afford it, its 100% your fault. 

Don has perpetual asshole mouth from all the shit he spews from it. I think this is Vank’s dickmouth face. I cant imagine daddy or the kush are packing more that a roll of pennies.

Government so small it fits in your uterus. Now let’s talk about the people who call themselves pro-life.

Does divorcing your cousin make family gatherings more or less awkward?