I would watch a full 28 episodes of American Horror Story: Smothered by Too Many Puppies.

It’s all part of Trump’s vengeful quest to bankrupt airports in Florida.

Trump’s blatant narcissism is so all-consuming that he can’t handle the realities of his new job - all that responsibility, all that criticism - so he’s going to try and relieve his ‘glory days’ on the campaign trail.

His new campaign slogan:

I really love AHS, but I haven’t been able to watch every season - more like every other - because sometimes it is just too much for me. I can barely listen to Hillary Clinton speak without crying. There’s no way I can watch this. Life is turning into more of a horror story every goddamn day. I need something a little…

I love Bedazzled. I don’t even know if people know it but it’s really funny.

It’s just going to be CSPAN clips for an entire season.

It’s too damn soon.

Guys, we shouldn’t have made all those “American Horror Story: 2016 Election” jokes on twitter. Murphy took us seriously. Ryan...revisit this is twenty years, when we might finally be digging our way out of this shitshow, and I can actually appreciate the absolute what the fuck-ness of the last year.

This is not the way in which I want to go about processing the cultural trauma that was 2016.

So, basically a documentary.

If anyone had bothered to ask poor Dr. Luke, I’m sure he would have explained the context that she is an unccooperative ballbusting overweight bitch who nevertheless persisted in trying to maintain some shred of independence.

If he said “No offense” and then she edited that out. Everyone knows “No offense, but . . .” allows you to say terrible shit to people.

Why does Dr. Luke always look like a divorced dad who just bought a leather jacket because he’s “trying to get back out there”?

Is the right “context” just...the patriarchy?

Sounds like she was allergic to starvation.

A list songwriters and producers are reluctant to give Kesha their songs because of her weight.

If she were Mormon, the former might worth criticism, and if she were an evangelical vegetarian I could see you litigating the latter. BUT SHE’S NEITHER

“Out of context” is about the same as an “alternative fact.” It’s like when you get caught doing wrong, “out of context” is the hail mary pass all scumbags fall back on.

There is no context in which shaming a woman for having Diet Coke and turkey is okay. I mean unless she is deathly allergic to Diet Coke and turkey, he can fuck right off.