I’m three stories in, and we’ve got one guy who quit because he got caught trying to steal from his business, one guy who quit because he didn’t want to fix his mistake, and one guy who quit because he wasn’t following the dress code. Should I read on, or are they all entitled assholes?

Please stop trying to make Pool Boys happen.

No, it’s because Billy’s made a career of being the Anti-American Soccer No Matter The Reason hot take artist. He doesn’t need time to do any fact checking or thinking things through because doing so gets in the way of his stated goal.

Though my Spanish is rusty, I also gathered that Sergio Ramos is no fan of the current U.S. immigration practice of separating asylee applicant parents from their children (since, he explained, it fails to separate the shoulders of the kids as well).

Ohhh, Joe Manchik. Not to be confused with FIFA Rules Expert and Match Commissioner Dr. Joe Machnik.

I’ve been in the exact same situation with my friends because I also have a Liverpool bias.  Every time Jesus has fluffed a chance I’ve texted them in jest while secretly not joking that “Bobby would have done better there.”

Brazil lost because they did not start Firmino again, period.  Every time he’s come on in every game he’s either scored or created goals for others.  Tite stuck with Gabriel Jesus to the detriment of the team.

This flavor makes paying the extra couple bucks for name-brand Advil Cold & Sinus worth it when you’re dying of the crud.

But basically I don’t think I have significantly lower odds of completing a PK than actual players.

Klutch Sports somehow only has the second worst globe logo ever:

Don’t feel too bad for Messi

My son wanted to watch it coz it looked cute/funny. He was bored halfway through the first episode, and I was laughing my ass off. I’ll keep watching, and he can revisit it when he’s had his soul crushed properly in the workplace.

Anyone checked on Billy?

Maybe they should’ve scheduled it so they’d arrive before halftime.

The same player who literally could not kick a ball into the penalty area on command is now playing and scoring regularly for the greatest national team of this generation. It is infuriating to watch, and that’s coming from someone who still roots for Ryan Babel and Jonjo Shelvey.

3 of the 4 you mentioned are retired, both Lampard and Kaka were signed over 3 years ago, and Cole is a non-DP player on a $350,000-a-year contract, so he doesn’t really fit the retirement tour model. Not entirely sure what you were going for there.

Except it’s really not.

No, it really isn’t. They’ve done a really good job of coming away from that, and giving DP money to players in their prime.

Tough draw for United.

Red Bull has 2 teams in the quarterfinals of Europa League. Oil money buys you Champions League spots. Energy drink money get you Europa.