What kind of monster has leftover pizza after a day or two?

I’ve got Grant beat: the consensus “best pizza in the city” award went to this Italian-named place close by. It was pretty good, but I'll NEVER return because one of their dipshit mustachioed owners got it in his head that Romans don't actually cut pizza into slices. They just serve it to you whole. Cue the tearing…

I don’t know what other supermarkets play, but my HEB plays full out 80's music. I hear “Let’s Dance” all the time there, “Personal Jesus” and other various 80's tunes drift through the aisles there, beats the shit of of most Muzak.

the savages who write in extolling the virtues of putting in the milk before the cereal

I used to work at a pizza restaurant. If someone was a dick on the phone, or called after 15 minutes to see where their pizza was, we would give them the “dry cut.” Meaning you just make the cut marks in the cheese and no deeper, leaving the crust entirely intact. Don’t mess with your food handlers.

C) You should have to live with the consequences of naming your kid Zyclee. That’s how self-governing works. You’re free to do what you want, but don’t be surprised if people want your cleverly-named child crammed into a garbage disposal when you do.

Standing barf story incoming...

That’s great if all you’re puking up is beer, but what about the meaty chunks from the taquitos you ate?

In fact, there’s nothing in the rules to prevent the catcher from doing just that (or so I would assume).

Re: Puking —

Kneeling also helps reduce the trauma from the horrible contractions that accompany the act if you’re unfortunate enough for it to be that bad.

New Year’s Day back in college, I woke up and felt like trash (pretty typical hangover stuff). I slowly walked to the bathroom, knowing that I wanted to puke, but…

So people are still saying “co-eds”?

In fact, there’s nothing in the rules to prevent the catcher from doing just that (or so I would assume).

Yeah, Austin never should have left. He was the last man standing, the champion of that particular pickup game.

Less useful is sticking your head into the hot girl’s orifice and asking if there’s any Pokemon in there.

Freshman year of college, my (now) wife puked in/on a stove at a house party. I was not there to witness this event, but the story goes that she was at a house party of some people she didn’t much care for. The urge to blow chunks came up and the sink in the kitchen was already taken with a fellow barfer. She quickly…

If I get a little too drunk and feel the need to throw up, I like to get as close to the toilet as possible. The added disgustingness of being that close to the shitter makes me vomit even harder, thus speeding up the process. You might get some splashback, but that’s just life, baby.

Milk/creamer before coffee is the superior pouring method. No stirring required.

“but am I wrong here?”

You’re not wrong, Zach. You’re just an asshole.

Put the shredded cheese in the bowl before putting in the chili. also, put too much cheese in.

I take one knee when puking like the QB at the end of the game. Its over