Not per gallon of milk made. Stop being ignorant.

Nah, another guy in the comments section had it right. “Nut juice.”

Cows drink several times that much water, also their excretions contain tons of methane which is crazy bad for the atmosphere compared to almond trees which are way more sustainable. On balance almond milk is a win, despite current drought in certain areas.

Almond milk is good. Almond milk in cereal is good. Almond milk in coffee is garbage and bad.

What the fuck is this? Almond milk is water with white food coloring in it. And almonds are sucking California dry. Can’t remember the last time I read something this stupid at Deadspin.

He needs his Moo-Cow fuck milk.

Jeez, who let Hamilton over here again? Sorry buddy, but you’re no Drew Magary. Drew Magary is funny, this is, well, I don’t know what but it’s definitely not adequate.

From the new blog, “Adequate Ham”

It’s consideration when one contemplates giving it to their children instead of cow’s milk (something Hamilton has clearly never seriously done).

Um...perhaps you meant to say, “nuts are not a significant source...”.

“My nut milk has twice the protein.” *High Fives Half Naked Dude* - Every Gym Bro..

Almond tipping not as fun.

Stop calling it that. Milk has a scientific definition. It cannot be secreted from almonds, soy, or your over-inflated ego.

In regards to the manufacture of almond milk, does the author know how many priests are required to coax the milk from the dark universe within a given almond? Are we considering that, maybe, there just aren’t enough acolytes or enough strange crystals to go around to fuel this lust? Also, what effect to the almond…

I can just see Lewis Black shaking in rage.

Almond milk sucks. Almonds are good. Milk is good. Almond milk can get fucked.

Um, you do realize you could have been buying two half-gallon jugs this whole time.

You can call it Almond Milk all you want, we all know it’s Nut Juice.

Cashew milk is better.