I assume we’ll just skip the conversation and increase our internet commenting during the work day.

Does this comment mean you live in a magical place where the ground outside doesn’t have any gross substances on it?

This is a wonderfully small town story and it makes me miss my hometown where this exact sort of shit would happen.

I hope they BOTH on sunburn on their scalps and it peeled and they were mocked for having nasty dandruff.

Good lord. With a mother like that the girl probably burglarized you b/c she felt entitled to be/do wherever/whenever. Sorry you got burgled.

I have pretty much given up Gawker for Deadspin and Lifehacker. My base irritation level has dropped significantly.

Oh. That’s too bad! My husband and I both work for massive corporations and we LOVE bitching about our jobs. The acronyms, the HR bullshit, the slow but steady decline in benefits. Ahhhhh. Maybe all you’re missing is some wine. Seems to make our bitchfests much more fun.

Man you turned this into something weird . . .

It honestly looks like one solid object, rather than thousands of individual hairs.

My absolute favorite type of internet comment is where someone misses the joke, and when several people point that out, they double down and INSIST it was not a joke. And they would know, b/c they have a good sense of humor!!!!

I thought it was funny. My sister is going for a dual masters in art history and . . . some other art thing and we make jokes all the time about how after she graduates I’ll let her live in my crawl space for free if she takes care of my house and dog.

Your husband sounds like a lazy asshole.

I’m super confused by your comment. Your husband bitches about his job but you don’t feel like you can bitch about your job? Or you think he bitches too much about his?

After almost every vacation, I find myself momentarily upset that I took like 3 photos in an entire week, and they were all scenery. But then I think it’s just a sign that I was having too great a time to remember to pull my phone out for a pic.

I think it was just a joke on the shitty job outlook for grads, especially non-STEM. Relax.

American Pharoah is a horse.

My governor is Rick Snyder. :(

Of all the comments I love on this thread (and there are many), I love yours the most.

This is the saddest thing I’ve ever read. I want to track this guy down so I can find him and help him make some friends and/or hobbies.

Equally disgusting? Saying I am glad that a this rare instance of justice is equally as disgusting to you as if I told you I had orally sodomized someone?