The best part was DeMario saying, “Who is this?” when seeing Lexi. If there was any doubt about his guilt for me before, that erased it. Like, if you’re such an upstanding guy with nothing to hide, why lie about knowing her?

My peak joyful moment of last nights episode was when Ashton Kutcher refused to engage in a waboom with Lucas. When even fucking Ashton Kutcher, who built his career yelling in trucker hats, thinks you’re too extra, you are probably too freakin extra.

She def came off as far more truthful than DeMario. At least she kept her story straight. He went from “I don’t know her” to “She’s crazy” to “Well maybe we hung out” in like 30 seconds. “The man might not be a prize” is a pretty big understatement.

Okay Peter’s date was FANTASTIC and their discussion of their gap teeth warmed my cold, dead heart to no end. It was so GENUINE!

No, it isn’t true. He was a hero for the Allies in WWII: https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2003/dec/28/monarchy.davidsmith

In more recent QEII badass news, she drove King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia around her estate (at speed, very competently) and scared the shit out of him: http://www.pbs.org/newshour/rundown/driving-king-anecdote-goes-viral/

This. She was a fucking *mechanic* and military truck driver during WWII while she was still a princess. This has always been my favorite bit of trivia about her.

I lost it when she eliminated him. This hot ass man, who looks like an actual disney prince, talked about how much he loves his grandma, and you picked some motherfucker who calls himself tickle monster? Girl we need to talk.  

I scoffed at her attempt at white girl tears. Dummy should have known what was about to happen when he put away his phone and freed his hand.

{preemptive eye roll at all the grays who will run in here to whine, “Yeah, she was “wrong,” but he was wrong tewwwwwwww!!!! The root is waycist and hypocritical for applauding…

Are you suggesting that an abusive straight cis white guy would appropriate LGBTQ culture in order to ride the recent (and refreshing) wave of acceptance of queer identities? Just to help propel his band to fame, and make cash hand over fist!? It’s all so difficult to believe.

Call me cynical, but yeah. I tend to suspect a lot of people self-identifying as non binary are tourists. Bowie wannabes.

I met Alan Thick and Tanya at a bar in Palm Springs. Within 5 minutes of meeting us she let us know that his last name was “appropriate” as as she looked down at his crotch.

Ugh Jennifer Lawrence sit down and let the people who work there do their damn jobs. No one needs you up on that stage.

I normally *hate* strip clubs but I admit that I had a fucking fantastic night at one in DC once. I was there on business while working at a miserable job. We’d all gone to dinner and kvetched and drank way too much wine. While walking back to my hotel, I decided that what I really needed at that drunken moment was a…

I get what you’re saying but a big issue with the Yulin festival is that animals (dogs and cats) were being tortured prior to being killed. It was something about making the stress hormone so the meat would be more tender. Any animal being tortured before being killed is fucked up.

To know anything about Lisa Vanderpump is to know that in addition to an almost maniacal insistence that she owns the color pink, Lisa cares more about the wellbeing of dogs and other assorted animals costing $1,500 or more than she does for most human beings. Just ask her husband Ken, who I assume must clear it with…

I am probably going get a lot of shit for this (I am not a troll, I swear), but the animals people get upset about eating and not eating have just never made sense to me. Like cows, ok. Pigs, ok. Horses, NOT OK. Dogs, NOT OK. Is it level of cuteness? Like Fido is your bff but a baby pig could be someone else’s bff and…

For a liberal hero, this is the weakest possible endorsement of impeachment possible.

I knew how hurt my family and friends would be after finding out and I didn’t want to put them through that.