Derrick>>>Kyle Anderson. Sorry, Kyle.

Yeah, people forget that Ancestry is a massive money-making op for the LDS church. They started gathering historical records because they famously used to pray for dead, including non-Mormons, then realized how lucrative it was for genealogy. They need competition.

True, and the white people who work there must be extra stupid or evil, because you would have to be not to acknowledge how fucked up that ad is. This is like that Pepsi thing all over again.

I’m sure black women are facing way more trouble at the scanners, but I will say that when I had long hair they always would make me get my ponytail patted down and checked. I’m a white woman and had fine, straight hair. I guess they had to make sure I didn’t have a teeny tiny shiv in my little stringy low pony.

Half those people he didn’t even want to see get a penny. I’m still amazed he didn’t have a will because he was such a savvy businessman and wasn’t on terms with all of his legal heirs, but maybe being JW, he thought nothing about his earthly stuff mattered once he died. (I’m not JW—just guessing).

I’m now over 30 and married, but I’m a woman and I prefer men with beards. I will not touch a goatee with a 10-foot pile, however.

“Video unavailable.”

Your advice is not state specific and if you actually read the article, you would realize he already had permission to do this, so stfu.

Again, you don’t need a license to cut hair for free.

I considered watching this, but then realized I don’t want to spend 10 mins recapping something I had to live through the first time.

Oh, I’m sorry, did you get lost on your way to Barstool?

Good call. The only time I ate pot brownies (as a teen), we made them both way too strong and way too delicious and I was violently ill the next day. I didn’t even get high that night, just sleepy, so it was a total waste of weed and brownies.

This whole thing looks like a Hallmark Channel movie and I’m kinda amazed half the people in it agreed to do it. 

I didn’t know you could get a resisting charge if it’s an off-duty officer mall copping it on his weekend for extra cash.

I always thought of Trump as King Joffrey, but I guess that could be Ivanka or Donny Jr. I haven’t watched GOT in years, so I’m no expert.

Exactly!!! Cops pick and choose what to charge all the fucking time. She’s a lying-ass liar.

I was surprised this was in the UK and not in a non-English speaking country. In addition to being possibly offensive, they are the kinds of names people make up for products in English when they’re using google translate and get it wrong. Crispy (ok, that describes food), Fluffy (is that describing the duck or the…

I also thought it was weird, especially because Giri wrote about the Spurs a lot. I pointed it out then, too.

Don’t sleep on Boban. 

I’m in the grays so nobody will ever see this, but I bet the Spurs are gonna do a little something nice for him tonight. I wonder if Timmy and Manu will be at the game.