The truth is much lamer. Rich people are dicks who don't like noise or lights.

"I would want to wish him the best and let him know I have no bitterness or animosity to him."

None of the same problems, eh?

I know what you're saying (at least I think I do, I'm not trying to act like I know everything you're thinking), and people are assholes.

Imagine a snide comment generalizing native americans, or women, or any other historically oppressed group.

Shear, eh?

I had a co-worker lecture me last week for "spoiling" Gravity. I looked on in shock, and said sardonically, "Bruce Willis is also dead, in case you wondered." Apparently you should never discuss a movie in any way ever, because someone might want to get to Star Wars at some point without knowing that Darth Vader is…

". . . and it was then that I had one of those moments when you go, "Holy..." I suddenly realised that I had choices. So I asked myself what is it I really want to do – what matters? I was in that place where suddenly I felt so strong." [said the rest of the quotation that you edited to make her sound the saddest.]

Most public school districts don't teach students to read cursive. It's not an American thing anymore.

Chameleonz was clearly oozing sarcasm, but I guess you stopped reading at "dummy first lady" and missed the "10 years ago before she was even in the White House??"

You clearly missed the point of that comment. That's so embarrassing.

I'll probably botch the explanation, but this does a good job of explaining it.

Surprising children with the return of a parent can be a hugely damaging thing to them. I find them incredibly emotionally manipulative.

The dogs get retired when they're still abroad, and according to DoD regulations, the military can't pay for "civilian" travel like that. Allowing them to be adopted is actually a huge improvement; they used to just leave the dogs there.

Why do you hate ellipses?

General manager Steve Yzerman said the 34-year-old will not travel with the team to play the Washington Capitals today.

"Men can't be raped."

As Editor-in-Chief of Deadpsin, I assume you have built up a respectable pedigree in your field and have the highest standards.

White people are the worst at taking a fucking joke.

Are you telling me that this internet meme is inaccurate? Ridiculous.