babe i got a dictionary and i think it’s safe to say we’re still gonna disagree

I gave my husband kittens twice last week ifyaknowhattamean

Yikes. My husband had one of his best girl friends as a groomslady and I thought she was bad. You sound kind of terrible.

Not necessarily a wardrobe malfunction, but my sister had many mini-meltdowns on her wedding day (pro tip for future brides: EAT SOMETHING. Hangry + bridal stress = meltdowns galore). Her final one was in the narthex of the church when she decided she absolutely could NOT get married in the shoes she was wearing and…

Hush, we'll not have this thinking business round these here parts.

I was teaching a college class, and it was exam day. Student emails me and says he won't be able to make it to the exam that day because his "car split in half while driving on the freeway."

States that can just secede already: Texas, Florida and Oklahoma.

Maybe thebronzekid thinks idiocy is a male body part?

yup. was veggie for four years, but switched back when i started living in hawaii and hunting my own.

Well, HE came so...

You're providing emergency services to refugees, not religious services. RFRA does not apply, exemption denied.

This makes me want to have an abortion and name it Liletta.

Pork Wine. The OTHER white wine.

Yeah. Gold and white.

That purse comes in two shades of gold? I see two shades of blue.

Keep an eye out for LiLo's new pearl earring line. It will be a limited release of about 3,000 pairs.

This gives me hope for the future.

Congratulations: you just became the 2016 GOP frontrunner.

I pray that some day "How is babby formed?" will not make me laugh but until that day, LOL.

I don't understand how my working at Jezebel has anything to do with me spending any time around babies. I would if my time with babies had decreased significantly since I'd started working here, but I'd say that I've actually had more interaction with small children in the past year. MANY OF US LOVE BABIES! THEY ARE…