I'm sorry that's your experience. That has not been my experience. When someone is communicating what they want/need, it is a conversation with give and take. And ultimatum is a command, plain and simple. There is no way to have dialogue about an ultimatum.

Same here.

I was about to argue with you until that last sentence. Your are right. I told my husband when I met him that I could not be comfortable with him being alone with his ex girlfriends. I acknoledged that it was my issue based on past infidelity. I know what I need and want in a relationship, so does he, and we should be…

Breaking up with someone because "it must end sometime " and referring to someone as being "mother" of a friend group , and seemingly putting this other woman on a pedestal are giving me "immature manchild " vibes, at best.

Well, for the record, I am of course kidding. Sexual adventurousness is a bonus for a healthy relationship, not a medication for a poor one.

Your dad is fucking awesome.

Good call. I'm seeing so many red flags I may have a seizure.

My mom gives ultimatums all the time. One time my dad finally gave her one. He said the next time she gave him one, their marriage was over. He told her he would stay married until all the kids moved out and/or she was self-sufficient (she was a stay at home mom) but it was over and he would not consider himself…

All in all, she's not very nice to me, and asks him to go out and do things and never includes me in the invite. I trust him, but i don't trust her. Makes me pissed because he won't acknowledge that if the roles were reversed he wouldn't be happy with this situation either.

UUUUH the madonna/whore thing! Thank you for recognizing it! I had an ex who had basically a platonic(?) crush on one of my friends, and would talk her up to me so much I'd be like "why don't you just date her, then?" and he'd be like "because everything I like about her would disappear if I had sex with her." He said…

this was my situation. My now ex husband was best friends with his high school girlfriend/casual sex partner after high school. At first I tried to be friends with her, but got nowhere. She just didn't want anything to do with me. She continuously lied and tried to break us up to the point where they didn't speak for…

or when your partner just isn't self-aware enough to realize the effect this kind of behavior has on you. Also, your post is so full of no! The "mother of the group" thing is totally a deal-breaker. Nothing worse than a partner who is looking for mommies in you or a friend.

THIS. So much! If the shoe were on the other foot, it would be a whole other story. Made me so mad.

THIS. I had a best friend in high school, and his girlfriend (who later became his wife) hated me with the heat of a thousand suns. There was never anything between us, in fact I gave him advice about how to get her to go out with him in the beginning. I wound up giving up the friendship when they got married—I had…

...because if someone gave me a choice between someone who gave me an ultimatum and someone who didn't give me an ultimatum, I would almost always pick the second person? P.S You do you though

Please do it sooner rather than later. I was in a dead-end relationship (see my story elsewhere in this thread) and kept it going WAY longer than it should because I didn't want to go through the pain of a breakup. Should've just done it and been over it, but instead I wasted YEARS on that asshole.

oh jeez - this is one of my biggest relationship deal breakers. If the guy I'm with can't deal with me having friends, I'm outta there. To me it's a sign of an unhealthy relationship, and a clue that the jealous person could be controlling and/or abusive (first thing an abuser does is cut back your support network.)

This is something my boyfriend and i argued about today. Him and his girl friend used to have casual sex, and she was really upset when we started dating. I've been kind to her, and attempted to be her friend, but she's always given me the cold shoulder while confiding in him. All in all, she's not very nice to me,…

I had a really good guy friend, and ended up living with his girlfriend when she was looking for a roommate (and I needed somewhere to live). BIG MISTAKE.

What if you're not angry at your partner's friend but angry at your partner because he WANTS you to act like a jealous weirdo about his female friend? Hmm?