My cat has a fancy cat tree, but she tore all the carpeting off it then immediately lost all interest. After that, she only got the $2 corrugated cardboard scratching things from CVS.

I think most people wouldn’t consider having electricity “living beyond their means”

My take on his motivation was that if its discovered that Crozier was right, and these friendly natives will save them, then his mutiny is off, and so is the promotion to lieutenant he’s finagling for himself afterward. He definitely looked off his gourd when he was killing them, but I guess he took his clothes off so…

A squirrel once found its way into the attic, climbed down through the walls to take up residence in the laundry room, then chewed a hole through the door so it could get into the house proper. I found it drinking out of the toilet.

Prince Charlotte? Did I miss something?

Subway sandwiches.

They’re not, like, putting a sticker on the table. They’re just grabbing the manager and saying, “hey we got an orange situation over at table 20"

My Fusion and the many many things that broke disagree

“Kent Brockman (apparently after having changed his name from Kenny Brockelstein)” But wait, I thought his real name was Brock Kentman?

Ignoring for now how absurd it is to think an unarmed child could take down an armed adult, I’m currently imaging a world where all the schoolyard bullies know judo.

Pretty sure those stacked up animals are supposed to be the Bremen Town Musicians

The best goldfish are the giant goldfish that are flat like actual crackers that they don’t make anymore. But if they do in some part of Canada, please let me know so I can dig up my passport.

Cool, thanks for explaining that. I was thinking to myself, “if they say she’s Asian, I’ll believe them, but I remember zero description of anyone’s races.” I mean, this is a book without named characters for cripes sake.

I remember being barred from PG-13 movies until I was actually 13, to the point where my parents would call up my friends’ parents to make sure I wasn’t watching any at their house. But once I was 13, they both bought me tickets to R-rated movies, and when they didn’t want to come into the theater with me, told me to…

My vet said the dog is too fat, and can’t have table scraps anymore. We tell him (the dog) he’s lucky to get his own special dog food at all, cause if he lived in Peru, he’d only get table scraps (but to be honest I think he’d prefer table scraps to the kibble)

Where was this solution when I had to drive directly into the sun for 300 miles on a straight road, and failed to resolve by wearing two pairs of sunglasses and holding a brochure in front of my face?

Ugh.

That could definitely work, but you have to admit that probably doesn’t occur to most people.

Parallel parking is hard, and the only way to get better is to practice. And every time you practice, you risk hitting/damaging two other cars. So yeah, I can see why it makes people anxious/not eager to practice.

Except that one time I drove around for three months with an expired plate sticker before I got a ticket. (Not a rebel, just plain forgot)