Mouth pump.

they taught me that on botched!

Please stop insinuating situations and relationships are “fake” on this show. You’re ruining the illusion.

I hate myself for knowing this, but they had to take tissue from his ear bc it was his third nose job.

Wait, this is the derp on the round-table show that was bragging about “hot people” like to hook up w/ other hot people. This dude is a 4.5/10 at best. I don’t even know if I’d mouth pump-him after 10 beers.

I don’t watch this show, but I watch all the Housewives. Do I need to start watching this show?

NEVER 4GET

Fun fact, a ‘unit’ of botox is actually called a “mouse unit.” It is called a mouse unit because it contains the amount of botulinum toxin required to kill 50% of a group of 18-20 gram female Swiss-Webster mice (median intraperitoneal lethal dose).

I'll pass, dude. I know what I mean and it’s not what you're saying. Thanks for this fun Internet interaction, though. Good luck in all your future endeavors.

Duck.

That’s a come-hither look if I’ve ever seen one!

(Well, I guess I’ve never seen one.)

And the issue was aging in a society that cannot wait to toss me in a dumpster at the first sign of decline.

Watched a show on PBS last night that featured an experiment involving sympathetic muscle movement in our faces and our ability to recognize other people’s emotional states. Conclusion - those real housewives are mean catty bitches because their paralyzed faces preclude empathy.

Huh? No... I said stop making big movies. I also said “do whatever you want.” She could totally make a bunch of small, weird indie flicks and plays and shit for a couple of years. Also, that is more directed toward letting the insanity of fame die down than anything else, so, like, stop stressin'.

The highest-paid actress in the world, still lagging far behind the men. JLaw, as the highest earning actress of the last year, made $52 million, which is 65% of what the highest earning man made (Robert Downey Jr. at $80m). Lawrence just barely outlearns Jackie Chan ($50m) and Vin Diesel ($47m) despite starring in…

Two words Jen.

What are our thoughts on the wood nymph who suns her vagina?

I feel like Ariana knows she is pretty awful. Also, I have a soft spot for her because my brother called her fame more than a year before she blew up. He had taken video of her for Seventeen and was all “she is going to be huge.”