It’s not worth an entire post. All the good people of Jezebel go home on the weekends, leaving me behind to find and write stories to both entertain and appall you. I write them as fast as I can, mistakes happen, and I correct those mistakes as soon as the grammar-loving crowd types their displeasure.

I literally came here to say exactly this. Why does it look like she slept in it?  I am 100% rooting for her so this isn’t shade so much as confusion about why she wants her make up to look like that.

Preface: I love Brit Brit! Buuuuttttt...

Even if he’s innocent of the more egregious charges, he still left his wife for her adopted daughter. The things that are facts should be enough. Who would want to engage with someone like that?

Funny, they told me the opposite if i stopped holding my Marvel Comics in public i might get a girlfriend.

Fuuuuuuck that noise. There are LGBTQ and POC in those states that deserve protection.

Politically incorrect opinion coming up, but hear me out.

These celebrities irritate me to no end. Because Im regular, I just cant even fathom at this point in time getting so much money and power that I want to take a common phrase to make it mine. First Kim with Kimono, now Taco Tuesday, both of which have been around for Idk how long, but they think they should have the…

That fourth doll from the right... is that doll... dead? 

Sauvage is the logical follow-up line to Jacobim Mugatu’s groundbreaking 2001 Derelicte.

That’s a “I hate your guts, but please keep me in the Will” move, if I’ve ever seen one.  Lol.

What? Entrance is free. You need a pass because of the extreme interest in the museum, but the passes are free. Of course you’re going to have to wait; do you not know how incredibly busy the museum has been since its opening? What are you even talking about?

lol. Shut it down on MLK day. The thing had a damn wait list, practically, and he wanted to shut it down on MLK day for his goddamn photo op.

“Isis”—the acronym used by the notorious extremist terrorist organization that claimed responsibility for the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks on New York City’s World Trade Center.

She has always looked amazing! Gabrielle Union is another one that I can see looking way younger than her age (she’s 46 now) when she crosses the 50 milestone.

Also, ‘member when she found out her (now ex-) husband was cheating on her and went full messy and emailed the details of his cheating to everyone in both their address books? She’s got a bit of Brandi Glanville in her and I'm here for it.

I love the grammatical decisions of the packaging.

A couple of years ago I ran through a string (3) of men that were unable to drive front facing into a parking slot. They backed into every slot. I questioned them and they said the same thing, “Makes for a quick get away.” All three turned out to be obsessive control freaks. Now if a man backs in, even one time, he’s…

Dumped a guy over his heavy Boston accent. I just couldn’t handle the way he would talk during sex, saying “Oh my gawd, ya tits are ahwsome!”. It was like banging Ted.

This is probably sexist but as bad as awful plastic surgery looks on women, it looks even worse on men. Did he have two golf balls injected into his cheekbones? Did his dentist steal those veneers from the set of a Jim Carrey movie? And you’d think if he was already going to the trouble of having so much work done, he…