I am extremely un-sporty and logo’d clothing doesn’t attract me at all. I wear dresses and skirts with woodland animals on them. I’m really not their target market.

I would never buy anything from Under Armor. I would, however, buy something from Uncle Martian. That’s a waaaaaaaay better name. I feel like Uncle Martian should be making those galaxy leggings all the kids are wearing, though.

I bought myself a promotion present.

I bought myself a promotion present.

“I know the D is the biggest. I’ve based my whole life on knowing that the D is the biggest.”

You get a star for making me snort at my desk.

It was so scary, he’d put his hand on my throat and use that to help support his weight...he’s about 380 pounds. He’s a horrible person.

That is terrifying. My ex-husband is going to kill someone. He used to choke me (against my will) while he had sex with me (against my will). He would always claim he “forgot” that I didn’t like it. I had no idea it was such a strong indicator for homicide. My god.

I was hoping for marshmallow fluff.

Of course thin people are allowed to feel insecure. They are not, however, allowed to make me feel worse over and over and over by whining to me about how disgustingly fat they are, and then telling me that I’m not fat. I ditched her because she used me to feel better about herself, while not actually caring about me…

I did end up losing 110 pounds of friend-who-consistently-doesn’t-care-if-she-hurts-my-feelings. Turns out, that made me look totally bangin’.

That is the most annoying thing. I used to have a friend that at 110 pounds, would constantly complain that she was “SOOOOO fat” and needed to lose 10 pounds. When I’d say, “Ok, if you’re fat, I must need to be lifted out of my house by crane, huh?” She’s get super defensive and tell me I wasn’t fat. If I weigh 240…

When I was looking at housing in London, these kinds of things were all over the place. They’re a good concept for young adults who don’t own furniture and who haven’t lived alone before. Apartment training wheels. What’s wrong with that?

I’m so with you. I follow some fashion bloggers and sewing bloggers and I don’t want to see more stuff from from the few clothing companies I follow, I want to see the bloggers. And I want people to see my posts. This change is totally pointless and making it harder to reach new audiences.

Not Being Here to Make Friends is definitely my #1. Seeing someone naked for the first time? That can be such a disappointment. For either party. Yikes.

See what an epic douchelord this guy is only makes me appreciate the formerly chubby mega-nerd turned sweet, sweet cinnamon roll, Taron Egerton, even more.

I feel bad for this kid, I really do. He probably never imagined that this would happen to him. NK is definitely making an example and using him as a bargaining chip. ...But why are we still allowing tourism to NK? I hope we manage to get this guy released and back home...as part of a larger “DO NOT GO TO NORTH KOREA”…

Oh my god, their website specifically says that it is extremely safe and that they “have never felt suspicious or threatened at any time.” Until now, I guess.

It is a super complex question. I sort of count him at a .75. Maybe in the future I will have sex with other people and he will no longer count. Or he will count as a full “1". Schroedinger’s sexual experience — he both is and is not a sexual partner. Either way, I’m glad I’m away from him too.

I have a super complicated relationship to that question, because my only sexual partner is my rapist. He’s also my ex-husband. I remember our first time, and that it felt more like an eventuality than a choice. Then again, I was almost 19 and tired of being a virgin. I know I initiated sex with him a lot, but I also…

My dad’s brother gave him the “Who’s going to carry on the family name?” bullshit when Dad got a vasectomy after two daughters. To his credit, my father looked at his brother and said, “Our last name is Martin. I think it’ll endure.”